Right now, the issue that I've stumbled upon is invitation wording. The wedding is being hosted by the groom and I, and it would be completely unlike us to just include the traditional "First-name Middle-name Last-name and First-name Middle-name Last-name request the pleasure of your blah blah blah" Please help! —Lisette
Ooh, if you think using your full names is traditional, I hate to think what you'd think of ye olde "Mr. and Mrs. Smith invite you to join them in a celebration of love as their daughter, Bride, is united in marriage to Mr. Groom, son of Mr. and Mrs. Brown." Bleah!
Wedding invitation wording really just comes down to who's paying. This page is a veritable "choose your own adventure" of traditional/formal wording, depending on who's paying. It's very complicated (what do you do about step-parents? What if your sibling is chipping in?) and (yawn!) oh so stiff and dull.
Want more invitation info?
- Non-froofy wedding websites with matching invites!
- Some of my favorite custom wedding invitations
- Badass DIY wedding ideas
Dull as these traditions may be, however, my only regret from our invitations (which we wrote from scratch — they're in my book — complete with my embarrassing invite typo) is that we completely ignored the whole "if your parents are helping, include their names on the invite" rule of thumb. (We split the cost of our $6000 wedding three ways: us, his dad, my dad.)
I think the best rule of thumb is to stay pretty basic — not formal, but basic. People are known to skim invites, and if you get too cutesy, too clever, or too longwinded, you increase the likelihood that someone gets confused. And remember: if you're having a nontraditional wedding you want to minimize confusion, because you're going to be maximizing disorientation. I vote for straightforward wording, with maybe one little piece of flair tossed in.
There's a related discussion about this topic over on the offbeat bride tribe, but I think my favorite collection of nontraditional invitation text I've seen is in this amazing thread over at kvetch. I had a blast re-reading the old thread and picking a few of my favorites:
No family mentions
This makes the most sense if you're paying for your wedding yourself
with joyous hearts
we invite you to attend
the wedding ofME
and
HIMdate, place, time.
food and merriment to follow
reception location
time

We joyfully invite you to our wedding celebration.
On this day we will marry the one
we laugh with, live for, dream with, love.Please join
Feline
and
Canine
at Time
on Date
Two thousand and fourPlace
Buffet dinner and dancing to follow.

Girl met Girl.
For the rest of the story
join us on
(date)
at (time)(location)
St. Paul, Minnesotaas Lauren
and Rebecca
celebrate their commitment.Light dinner and dancing to follow.

You are invited to a celebration
of the beginning of our new life together
as we are united as husband and wife
on Saturday, the eleventh of September
two thousand and four
at six thirty in the evening
(Address), Los Angeles, CaliforniaFood, Wine and Merriment to immediately follow!

Please join us
to share our joy and support our love
As we exchange vows and are united
in the commitment of marriage.Speeder Middle Last
And
Munkey Middle HislastSaturday the twelfth of March
at Half past five o'clockThe Naples Room
MilwaukeeDinner and Dancing to Follow

Because your love and friendship
have guided and inspired us,
we invite you to join us as we exchange
our wedding vows.FireDragon
and
FireRamSunday, the eighteenth of September,
two-thousand and five
four o'clock in the afternoonamidst the sequoias
at The Beautiful State Park in
My Hometown, Californiareception and rock 'n' roll to follow

Ms. Crazydoglady
and
Mr. CrazydogladyBecause your love and friendship
have helped us become who we are,
we joyfully invite you to share in our
celebration of love and commitmentTogether we laugh, we dream, we love,
and on this day, we marryFriday, the fourth of November
Two Thousand and Five
Eight o’clock in the evening
Cool place
Blue county, Red StateDessert reception immediately following

Family included
While I don't think you need to get into "Mr. So 'n' So, parents of such 'n' such," it is nice to recognize family if they're helping you foot the bill. These examples include several ways to do that.
Together with our parents we invite you
to share our joy and support our love
as we are exchange vows and are united
in the commitment of marriageSnowKate's full name
and
SnowMate's full nameSaturday, the thirtieth of April
two thousand and five
at five o'clockWinery Name
Napa, CaliforniaFood and festivities to follow

Please share our joy
at the wedding ofRuchby
daughter of RuchbyMom and RuchbyDad
and
Mr. Ruchby
son of Dad and Mom MrRuchbyMonday, the fifteenth of September
two thousand and three
at eleven o’clock in the morning
Glen Oaks Country Club
Farmington Hills, MichiganFeast and merriment to follow

This day I will marry my best friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love
Reenie
and
Mr. NNG
together with their children,
invite you to share in the joy and
celebration of their marriage
and the joining of their families
on Friday, the thirtieth of December
two thousand and five
at half past six o'clock
in the evening
Church
Street Address
Our Town, Ohio

Love was meant to be shared
with parents, family and friendsMelfirst Mellast and FHfirst FHlast
together with our parents
Melmom1st and Meldad1st Mellast &
FHmom1st and FHdad1st FHlastInvite you to share our celebration
of lifelong love and commitment
in the ceremony uniting us in marriageSaturday, the nineteenth of August
two thousand and six
at half past five in the eveningName Of Site
12345 Main Street
City, CaliforniaDinner and merriment to follow










Comments on "Wedding invitation wording that won't make you barf"
23 responses to this entry · Comments feed (RSS 2.0)
RC
December 6th, 2007 · 6:58 AM · #
I made the mistake of including a web address but not mentioning "Directions, registry information and more at http://www….." so not many people knew that the website had so much info. I just had too many non techie friends and relatives.
Side note: I loved "Choose Your Own Adventure" books as a kid. Time flies…
Rachel
December 6th, 2007 · 8:00 AM · #
Thanks for this since I've been pondering more ideas since reading the book.
missv
December 6th, 2007 · 4:05 PM · #
We kept ours really simple but we did want to acknowledge contributions by family members:
Together with their families
My Name and His Name
invite you to join them for their marriage celebration
Saturday, the 2nd of February, 2008
at five o'clock in the evening
Location details
Olivier
December 7th, 2007 · 11:24 AM · #
Right on with the advice. This is what we see most of the time. "no family mention" makes a lot of sense if you're paying for the wedding. For complicated situations, "together with our parents" does wonders.
Summerbride2008
December 11th, 2007 · 11:32 PM · #
I just had to comment on how cool your wedding invitations are. Even cooler that you made them yourself! Congrats.
chuck
December 18th, 2007 · 8:48 AM · #
i personaly hate the cheesy wedding invit wording…so when i made mine i wanted somthing nice and the word wedding left out. to me it wasnt a wedding it was called a handfasting so i worded it like
this
the honor of your presence is requested at the celebration of and coming of hands of me and him
jessie
January 2nd, 2008 · 4:40 PM · #
I just wanted another great idea a friend of mine did recently at her her wedding which was a roaring success. On the r.s.v.p. card they included:
Number of guests attending: _____
AND
Song request #1:__________
Song request
Instead of paying for an expensive d.j., they hooked up their laptop, after downloading everybody's tunes and had a friend play the list. The dance floor was packed all night long!
Offbeat Bride | Take requests from your guests
January 3rd, 2008 · 5:56 AM · #
[...] love this idea from Jessie: I just wanted another great idea a friend of mine did recently at her wedding which was a roaring [...]
Lety
January 3rd, 2008 · 3:31 PM · #
thanks for sharing.
im going to do this do. its a great idea
Angi (DJ Snakegrrl)
April 23rd, 2008 · 11:23 AM · #
For our Halloween wedding, we are going to incorporate some prose from Poe, Lovecraft or Bearse into the invitation wording. I have left this task to my extremely bookish fiance in order to help him feel more involved in planning the event. He sometimes feels he has to do the "typical groom" thing and butt out.
As for the response cards, I've opted for a funnier "How many in your ghoulish horde will we be expecting?" with an altered pic of the infamous elevator scene from "Dawn of the Dead" for a background.
jennifer
April 29th, 2008 · 8:04 PM · #
my family situation – dad and step mom paying for everything. mom and step dad are contributing in other ways (helping make favors, playing some music, general support) my fiancés mom isn't able to help and his father has passed away but. my step mom (basically my second mom) is farily traditional and i really wanted to asknowledge that her and my dad were hosting but, i couldn't say "their daughter" as it would seriously offend my mom. i also wanted to find a way to include my fiancé's parents so – here it is:
Robert and Sharon Smith
along with Patrick and Jane Brown
invite you to join them
as their daughter
Jennifer Marie
is united in marriage to
Mr. Ray Wright
son of Maria and the late Wolfgang Wright
on Saturday the sixteenth of August
two thousand and eight
at four o'clock in the afternoon
Location
City and State
Dinner and Dancing to follow
it made everyone happy!
Irene Matern
May 26th, 2008 · 3:29 PM · #
We were also stuck on how to word the invitations. My honey came up with a brilliant plan—and executed it with aplomb! He designed and printed invitations that looked like airplane tickets. They have all the basic information and expressed our theme of travel—a theme that allowed us to be eclectic with our design decisions. There were no "esquire" or Mr., Mrs., or Ms. anywhere in addressing them. Glorious!
Nichola
May 28th, 2008 · 8:45 AM · #
When my husband and I were married a couple years ago and we loved our invitations that we made so much that I just have to brag a little about our creativity. Instead of the boring normal invitations we listed in a sentence some of the things that we had done together. I think it went like this…
They have been running mates and boxing partners, something and something else, but most of all they have been best friends. Please join them as they become husband and wife.
Marissa
May 31st, 2008 · 10:15 AM · #
I love the song request on the RSVP card! Thanks for a great idea!
Ladyluck
June 4th, 2008 · 3:56 PM · #
We want to make it clear that my parents are hosting, but we want to include FH's parents on the invite. It's hard with our wording, since we don't want to have him listed as "son of…"
So far this is our wording – I'm open to suggestion!
In the City of San Francisco
a half mile from where the ocean meets the bay
Bride Full Name
and
Groom Full Name
will pledge their commitment to each other
before the people who have filled their lives
with happiness, love, and laughter
BrideFather BrideStepmom BrideLast
invite you to join them,
GroomFather GroomMother GroomLast
and Bride and Groom's community of family and friends
in witnessing this ceremony
on the lawn of the [place]at four o'clock, the twentieth of September
A celbration with dinner, drinks, games, and dancing
will follow immediately
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