You might be an Offbeat Bride if…

Guest post by Cassie

You might be an Offbeat Bride if…

…you ask your engaged friend, “What are your centerpieces going to be, and how are you making them?” and she looks at you funny and says the florist is bringing them. Then you remember, oh yeah, centerpieces are usually beautiful flower arrangements brought in by florists, not the homemade weird concoctions made from a combination of dried gourds, vintage buttons, wind-up toys, and mini cast-iron bicycles that you were planning on.

…your relatives think your engagement must be off just because they can't find a big box registry for you.

…you ask a bride-to-be what color her dress is and she says, “Do you mean ivory vs. white?” and you remember not everyone considers red/purple/rainbow/polka-dotted dresses for their wedding day.

…when you mention you're getting married, strangers, store clerks, and vendors give your bare ring finger a long look mixed with pity and suspicion.

…your engaged best friend plans a 5-hour-long mimosa/hair appointment the day of the wedding and you remember not all brides plan to spend their pre-wedding time carting in the alcohol, dishes, glasses, decorations, etc. to the DIY reception site.

…your friend asks, “What are your colors?” and you stare at her blankly for 10 minutes because you have no idea what the heck she's talking about.

…friends and family announce “Yourname Hislastname!” and then say how good it sounds before you can stop them and explain you're keeping your own name.

…friends are not amused when they ask what your theme is and you say, “Um…getting married?”

…a coworker asks, “Have you found a church yet?” and you respond, “For what?”

…your toilet tank conspicuously lacks a stack of thick bridal magazines, and instead features a funny little blue book by some chick who has “Meadow” in her name.

And finally, you know you're an Offbeat Bride when you celebrate your best friend's traditional wedding, because that is exactly what she wants and that is exactly awesome for her!

…And then you go out searching for the perfect set of hot pink and purple polka-dotted frogs for your cake topper and all is well in the world.

Now I'd love everyone reading to make their OWN lists of “You know you're an Offbeat Bride when…” and post it in the comments! We all have different experiences and weddings and obviously my list doesn't apply to everyone. Tell me about how you knew when YOU were an Offbeat Bride!

Comments on You might be an Offbeat Bride if…

  1. I’m sewing two capes onto my black-open-back-to-show-off-the-Batman-tattoo dress. I still have to figure out how to bedazzle my combat wedding boots. To say the least….

  2. You know you’re an offbeat bride when.. family asks about the details and upon answering you have to insist you’re being serious. ‘Yes, we really are having kebabs! No, not for dinner tonight, for the wedding!’

  3. You know you are an offbeat bride when…

    … you go to a Wedding fair and absolutely hate everything there from the dresses and the cakes till the whole vibe of the wedding industry

    … you don’t have an engagement ring to show of with and don’t care

    … you abhor most wedding rings in jewelries, but found THE perfect ring in 5 minutes on Etsy

    … you rather read offbeat wedding blogs than wedding magazines

    … you consider wedding an H&M dress in stead of a four figures dress

    … you plan on DIY’ing your entire wedding, from the decorations till the food

    … you’d love to get married in the woods on bare feet

    … you want as few guests as possible

    … you don’t want to receive any gifts

    … you plan to handpick the flowers for your wedding

  4. You know you’re an Offbeat Bride if….
    …your family accuses you of putting on a play instead of a wedding
    ….your future husband has to order his outfit special made from an online dealer
    … Your family and friends ask time and time again, why are you getting married without religion being involved?
    … You have to explain what a bridesman is

  5. When you have to explain to your celebrant twice that yea the ring exchange and legal vows are smushed into one. The legal vows are a technicality and the ring is cause you like shiny things. But you have already written out the handfasting for her 🙂

  6. …You have “with bonus Vikings” on the end of your wedding description
    …You’re getting married in a church in a red and black strapless dress with visible tattoos
    …You’ve written an after dinner speech that starts with a reference to Babylon 5
    …You’re learning how to appreciate all the different kinds of weddings that people have

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