The mother of all “Oh-Shit!” Kits, featuring the Decormergency Kit

Guest post by Ashhammell

oh-shit-kitI took my years in the theatre, a stint in event-planning, and the combined ingenuity of Megan and (seemingly the entire) Offbeat Bride community on this post, and I compiled the Mother of All “Oh Shit!” Kits stock lists.

Here it is — all in one place, for your handily-wedding bliss — and I promise that they can all fit into a regulation medium-sized toolbox — I have done it with my own hands!

“Oh Shit!” kit #1: The ultimate wedding survival kit


“Oh-Shit!” kit 2: Decormergency

Tips for both kits

  • Assemble them a few days before the wedding, save your receipts and return whatever you don't open if you won't use it.
  • List the contents of the kit clearly on the OUTSIDE of the container.
  • Tell EVERYONE where it is, and make it visible enough for them to see it in an emergency.
  • Bring it with you from where you're getting ready! Don't forget it — it's no use to anyone if it's not where the party is!

Okay guys, back me up: what'd I forget?

Comments on The mother of all “Oh-Shit!” Kits, featuring the Decormergency Kit

    • I’m toying with the idea of folding fans as favours and/or carrying one myself. That way, if all the batteries get used it’ll still be useful. 🙂

  1. I’d add that aspirin back in, honestly – it can do a lot of good in the case of a heart attack

    • I personally find it more effective for pain relief than paracetamol or ibuprofen.

      And on a more vain note, it’s good for pimple emergencies too.

  2. extra boutonniere
    extra rings
    some ribbon (some matching the dress, some matching the decor)
    prescriptions of the wedding party
    sensory kit in case of overload (include objects to touch, smell, taste, see, and ear)
    an extra pair of flats

  3. I love how vodka is in both of them!

    Scissors. I’d recommend one in each box.
    Any prescription medications you take.
    Eye drops. Related: contact solution/case and glasses just in case (if you use them).
    Purell and a BAR of soap.
    Shoe polish.
    I second Matthew’s suggestion of cash.

    In addition to all of your vendors, I’d recommend doing research well in advance on the closest hospital, walk-in clinic, emergency dentist, and 24-hour pharmacy. Include directions and phone numbers. According to Murphy’s law, if you do the research and have the information, you won’t need it, so make Murphy work for you!

      • Funny you should mention that…

        At my wedding, I did research on all of the medical stuff we might need. As I hoped, we didn’t need any of it.

        I didn’t research cabs. We needed one.

        I hate Murphy.

  4. THAT WAS TOTALLY WICKED! (I’m the Tribesmaid that supplied the pantyliner trick.) I’ve just sat here wracking my brain to remember what else is in my stage manager’s kit and all I can come up with are a couple of rubber bands and pony tail elastics for the Ultimate Oh Shit Kit. (Said SM kit lives in my trunk and as much as I love you all, it’s snowing out there and I just took my bra off. I’m in for the night.) The Decormergency kit needs a scraper/razor blade (gum off shoes, tape off of venue windows, etc.).

    And serious tip: screw Duct Tape– spring for gaffer’s tape. SO MUCH BETTER than the other stuff.

    This crap will hold a grown man to a 2″ steel pipe dangling over 10′ in the air. (He volunteered! Don’t ask. It’s theatre.) It doesn’t get gummy and leave tracks on carpet unless you let it stay there for hours or it gets hot (like 250* hot). It doesn’t take your skin with it unless you’re *trying* to wax your arm. It’s rubberized, so it can work as an emergency insulator if an electrical cord gets pulled/splits. It’s not shiny so you can use it on the bottom of your shoes for traction or to help reattach a heel pad. SO MANY USES.

    • I carry a pack of those little clear hair elastics almost everywhere these days. They’re close in size to the ones I used when I had braces, and I often end up tying my shoulder-length, heavily layered, thicker-than-it-looks hair back due to practical situations and weather conditions. And 300 of the suckers pack into a credit card-sized ziplock pouch. 🙂

    • I was JUST going to say Gaff Tape > Duct Tape and it comes in all the colors ever! Theater folk for the WIN!

      Also, Vodka isn’t so good for stains but it IS good for getting out smells. We use it to get rid of BO on costumes that can’t be washed. (Something to think about next time you find yourself at the ballet is that those tutus have never been washed.)

  5. Your glasses! You never know when you’re going to rip a contact or your eyes will get so irritated that you just can’t wear contacts. Glasses are a great back up plan incase your contacts fail (you don’t want to be half blind at your own wedding!)

  6. Washcloths/small towels. We camped in cabins at our wedding, and I had to use toilet paper (ew) to wipe off my Pond’s makeup remover because I had everything under the sun in my oh-shit-kit except a washcloth. *sigh*

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