Wedding overload: When to stop looking at wedding inspiration

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Literally hundreds of colored dresses.
Thanks to Lauren Lemon for submitting this photo.

What's going on when a bride buys a dress, and then finds another dress, and then picks a third dress because they keep seeing dresses they like online? What's going on when people come up with five different wedding themes over the course of two months, and still can't quiiite decide? What about when Facebook commenters' enthusiasm for someone else's wedding starts to slip over the edge from inspiration (“ooh, I might want to integrate something like that in my wedding”) to duplication (“I MUST HAVE THOSE EXACT GREEN BOOTS WHERE DID YOU GET THEM TELL ME NOW NOW NOW!”)

It worries me a little…

Bride in Green Boots

I don't want Offbeat Bride to be the place where you come to feel bad about the decisions you've already made about your wedding. I don't want it to be the place where, as you plan your simple outdoor gathering you start feeling like “OMG, that girl painted her shoes and they look amazing. Why don't I paint my shoes? What's wrong with me that I'm just wearing a pair of pumps that I bought on ebay? What about those green boots? Where can I get them? OH MY GOD!”

What I'm talking about here is wedding fetishization — when things slip over from inspiration to fixation. I don't want wedding inspiration to be the unattainable weird fantasies that keep you up at night with frustrated longing. I don't want people to scrap their perfectly lovely plans because they saw something else, something better, something MORE on my silly wedding website.

My goal with this site has always been to focus on general inspiration. This isn't a shopping blog where every day there's a new link to click to buy some wedding accessory that will make your special daaaaaaay more perfect and tasteful. It's just a collection of real folks doing their real best to cobble together weddings that reflect who they really are.

If looking at Offbeat Bride ever makes you feel disappointed in yourself, or like your wedding doesn't quite stack up, or like you're not offbeat enough — please, please PLEASE, remind yourself that your wedding is not a contest. No fetishes necessary. Turn off your computer and go hug your partner and tell them how much you love them and how excited you are to celebrate that with your family and friends.

Offbeat Bride's wedding photos are here to inspire and delight — not ever to make you feel dissatisfied, unworthy, or disappointed in yourself.

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