OPEN THREAD: Would you have a weekday wedding?

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10My love has his mind set on getting married on a weekday – that is, on the day of our fifth anniversary, the 1st of April, 2014. A FREAKING TUESDAY!

I would love to get married on our anniversary, it's so meaningful. I know that many of our friends don't have plain regular Mo-to-Fr-9-to-5-jobs and would nevertheless have to schedule a leave day from their jobs (doctors, musicians, and so on). I know that many people will have to travel to attend our wedding and that I would be heartbroken if some can't make it. We're just not the kind of people who would enjoy a wedding ceremony and supper and then go to bed – we love to party, but we don't (he doesn't) want to party on the 36th of Whatnot, as if it were any kind of birthday party or something.

Would you have your wedding on a weekday? Would you, as a guest, attend a wedding on a weekday? -restlesshedonist

Ooh, we love this idea — and in fact Offbeat Bride has a whole archive of midweek weddings! That said, there certainly are some special considerations, including travel and partying.

We'd love to hear from those of you who had or are planning midweek weddings — did you get many guests saying they couldn't come? Did you party late into the night even though it was a Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday?

Comments on OPEN THREAD: Would you have a weekday wedding?

  1. We didn’t have much of a “party” wedding (it was in the afternoon) so I can’t weigh in on that, but I would say actually that having friends that will have to take off days no matter what, especially to travel, frees you up from the traditional weekend. It will also make things cheaper to do that for both hotels and your own planning.

    That said, I would look at your guest list and see if it will be prohibitive for the people you MOST want to come to have to take days off in the middle of the week versus the weekend. I think you guys will probably end up enjoying the day more if you can party the way you want to and have the people you most want to be there be there on your special day than if you have your anniversaries line up. (As someone who has a wedding anniversary at the beginning of the month and our dating anniversary at the end of the same month, it’s actually a little fun, and practical, to have anniversary stuff be able to be spread out!)

  2. My husband and I were married on a Thursday and it worked out wonderfully. However, our wedding was very small, with only close friends and family attending. Our reason for having it on a weekday was mostly because our honeymoon was an anime convention that took place that weekend. I think a bigger weekday wedding is doable. The most important thing is giving everyone plenty of notice, even more than you regularly would for a weekend wedding. There still might be some people who won’t be able to attend, you will have to weigh that against having it on the day you want. Good luck!

  3. Obviously, you need to do what’s right for you, but as a guest, I think weekdays weddings are quite inconvenient. My fiancé only gets 10 days off work a year and between visiting our far-flung families and taking vacations, he usually runs out quickly. Of course, for a close friend or relative, we’d make it work, but we’d probably have to decline otherwise. If you do opt for a weekday wedding, just understand that some of guests won’t be able to make it.

  4. I kind of wanted to get married on December 12, 2012 (a Wednesday), but I’m glad we didn’t! About 6 months before the wedding I got a job in retail (weekdays only!), and I didn’t want to ask for time off in December. Most of our family and friends were either still students at the time or working Mon-Fri jobs.

    We were also planning on about 150 guests, and a lot of them were from out of town.

    We ended up getting married on Saturday, January 5th, 2013, which is the 12th day of Christmas, so it all worked out 🙂

    Though I should mention that we were very lucky to have our parents paying and so had lots of budget to work with, so having it on a date where lots of people could make it and the extra cost wasn’t a factor we had to consider.

  5. We finally opted to do our wedding on a Saturday night, but were planning on doing it on Monday, our two-year anniversary. It’s also a day of the month (the night we met) that we celebrate every month. But it was important to us to have family there, and almost all of my fiance’s family lives out of town. Also, all of his siblings have school-age children and would have had to take them out of school. So we chose the Saturday before the Monday that our anniversary falls on.

  6. We are having our wedding on a Friday… I was a bit worried about that myself. But, I was able to get over it when my bff reminded me that, no matter what day it is, the people who mean the most to you will be there no matter what!

  7. We’re getting married on a Monday, so we don’t qualify as mid-week but we’ve had plenty of comments from our parentals about “people have jobs you know, how can you get married on monday?” Our response has been, and remains to be: We know it will be a little difficult for people since yeah jobs, but this is our wedding. The people we invite will know it’s only happening once and what it means to be invited, so if they choose to not come that is going to be more of their loss than ours.

    Of course we’re both sympathetic to the fact that not everybody has super flexible jobs, but if they really love and care, and want to be a part of our day we know they’ll show up. Plus, we’re also sending our STDs out 7 months before the wedding, and then invites nearly 4 months before so that there is PLENTY of time for people to plan to show up which is probably, as far as I can tell, the most important part of planning a non-weekend wedding…..

  8. I am getting married on a Monday. We both have big families and in order for us to afford a venue of that size a weekday wedding was a better option to save money than slashing the guest list. It was important to us to be able to include everyone. It will be a national holiday (Veterans Day) so some people will already be off work/school and we plan to have an acknowledgement for Veterans during the reception. I know it is not exactly convenient for everyone and I feel bad about that (especially those with kids) but I’m hoping it is an important enough event to take a day or two off work. I must say, it is getting old responding to questions or well intended jokes about the wedding date. I don’t want to make people feel bad by telling them we can’t afford a Saturday wedding, but what else can I say?

    • I am getting married on veterans day too 🙂 I have received so much back lash from my family but this is what we can afford and what we want. Our families have more that a years worth of notice

  9. my late husband and i got married on a tuesday. we “eloped” and the family coming to witness were taking the week off anyway, so it really didn’t matter what day of the week it was. since there were only going to be 6 people besides the bride and groom, we figured it would be a waste of a saturday for the venue (which was an old farmstead in pigeon forge, TN, owned and operated by a photographer couple).

  10. I think with weekday weddings it’s worth thinking: how many days off work would my guests have to take? A Friday afternoon wedding would just be one day if guests could travel on the day and leave on Saturday. A Tuesday morning, for example, might mean taking part of Monday off, Tuesday, and possibly Wednesday if the party continued late… So it’s not just the day but the distance of travel and the timing of the wedding. Getting married on an anniversary is nice though I personally would rather pick a day my guests were very likely to be able to attend, since their presence would mean more to me than a specific date. If that’s not true for you, though, go with the date that you want! It’s your day 🙂

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