So what happens when a wedding blogger gets engaged? Let's find out together with Wedding Planning Wednesdays. Wednesdays are when I (ironically) take the day off of working for the Offbeat Empire, and then spend the day perusing Offbeat Bride, planning the wedding. Weird, right?
We thought, however, that y'all might like to get down on the wedding planning with me! So every(-ish) Wednesday I'll be posting about what I'm thinking about, bumping up against, and searching for this week. That way, those of you on the same path can commiserate and brainstorm with me, and those of you who have been there/done that can drop some knowledge.
Here's what I've done so far:
- Set the date: June 24, 2017
- Found the venue: Mike's mother's backyard in Mendocino County (located on the north coast of California, 2-ish hours outside of San Francisco)
- Set a budget: Undisclosed, but self-funded
- Worked up a preliminary guest list: 150-ish people so far
- Contacted a photographer: Not booked yet, because Mike balked at the cost (oh, sweet sweet baby boy, get ready to be even more shocked at the cost of weddings).
What I'm having trouble with:
Finding the right wedding planner is my number one goal
This isn't my first rodeo, I know how stressful event planning can be, especially when they're taking place at your family's home! I want everyone to be able to relax (as much as possible) and not worry about the minutia. Therefor, we need a team of professionals to handle the bullshit, and help me brainstorm the cool shit. Sadly, my go-to wedding planner is no longer able to plan weddings out of the LA area. So here's my question: Do I hire an LA-based planner, who I can meet up with in person easily? Or do I hire a wedding planner from the Bay Area, and hope their knowledge extends two hours north of there? Or do I try to find a local planner, and hope that they can grok my Offbeat shiz?
I've been living in an Offbeat Bubble
I have been working at Offbeat Bride for 7 years — so long that I forgot that there is still an entire universe of people out there who still think that there are rules about weddings. I've caught people saying things like “I know it's supposed to be ‘all about the bride,' but…” or mentioning flower girls and first dances, as if they're obviously happening. I've already been called “Bridezilla” three times, because I dared to voice a strong opinion. Wow man, it's a wide world of wedding fuckery out there, and I have been in such a protected bubble for so long, I was shocked by it. I see now that I'm going to have to do a LOT of gentle reminding that there are no rules for weddings.
“I can't wait to see what kind of epic wedding you're going to have!” People say. “I'm sure there shall be all kinds of crazy things happening.” Here's the real crazy thing: If it were up to me, I'd track down that unicorn that sneezes glitter and pees lemonade, I'd have a bounce house, I'd get married in a most unexpected location in LA, I'd pepper the ceremony with foul language, and decorate with pop-culture references… but I'm not marrying myself. I have a wonderful partner who's always wanted to get married on his family's property (that's not in LA), who wants to create a safe (non-super-cussy) space for his niece and his friends' kids, who doesn't care for glitter-pissing unicorns, and thinks bounce houses are cesspools of disease (he's not wrong, but I think it's worth it). Relationships are about compromise, when you're not of the same exact mind.
So this Offbeat Bride's wedding won't be so intensely offbeat that it'll go viral. I'm going to, of course, get in offbeat touches here and there, and it will be unusual and fun. But if you're expecting glitter, pissing, and fucking, I'm going to let you down. I'm sorry.
Posts that I found particularly helpful this week:
- Hello, checklist. Let's get started!
- Our list of offbeat wedding coordinators
- And these woodland-themed weddings:
What posts have you found helpful this week? What advice would you give to someone planning a destination-ish wedding in the same state as far as vendors? And what kind of things are you struggling with this week?