Category Archive

identity

Having a bridentity crisis? Not sure what this whole wedding thing means when it comes to who you are as a person? Let’s work through some identity issues together. (Also, you may want to check out the book The Conscious Bride, which addresses a lot of personal identity issues related to wedding planning.)

How one international adoptee bride reclaimed her identity through her wedding

I am an international adoptee from India. Many times in transracial and/or international adoption, the adoptee loses a sense of identity when they are raised outside of their race and culture. I know for myself, I was raised in a predominantly white town by a white family, so I lost my identity as an Indian. As a bride, I decided to reclaim my identity. I am a “hybrid”, both Indian and Anglo-American…

Don't call me Mrs. Miller: last names, Lucy Stone, & why I'll be keeping my name

Don’t call me Mrs. Miller: last names, Lucy Stone, & why I’ll be keeping my name

Since getting engaged, I have been bombarded with well-meaning friends and family members congratulating the “soon-to-be Mrs. Miller” on her engagement. While my external response is generally, “Haha, thanks,” my internal response is, “Mrs. Miller? Who is she? Do I know her? Please pass on my congratulations.” Because that isn’t me, and never will be. […]

I bought a colored wedding dress and now everyone's mad! What should I do?

I bought a colored wedding dress and now everyone’s mad! What should I do?

I come from a family of strict traditionalists when it comes to everything, especially weddings. I recently bought a peach wedding dress with no sleeves and expressed I wanted light blue hair and Converse to go with it. As you can imagine, things didn’t go over well. When I try to stand up for my wedding choices, I’m shamed for it.

Please help!

The challenges of planning a straight wedding as a feminist queer bride

The challenges of planning a straight wedding as a feminist queer bride

Planning a straight wedding as a lifelong feminist and member of the LGBTQ community was a challenge wrought with emotion, guilt, and confusion (in addition, of course, to all the blissful feelings of being engaged and in love)…

My husband is not a hero for marrying me

My husband is not a hero for marrying me

I’ve been with my husband for almost five years. We were friends for a few years before we became a couple. During that friendship, I got sick and began having a lot of muscle problems. I was handed several misdiagnoses before my doctors decided that I have an autoimmune disease. I have since been diagnosed […]

Are we "desperate" or just ready? The guilt of wanting to get married

Are we “desperate” or just ready? The guilt of wanting to get married

Lately I’ve been feeling guilty. Then I’ve been feeling guilty about feeling guilty because I should know that I don’t need to feel guilty. I’ve been feeling this way because I happen to be a woman who wants to get married someday. This in itself isn’t a new development, but now I actively WANT it. Now “quirky engagement rings” keeps finding itself in my Pinterest search history and Offbeat Bride is gradually making its way up my most visited sites. It’s literally proposal guilt.