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Male wedding privilege as seen from a transgender groom's perspective

I have been thinking about the weird privilege I've held as the male-presenting person in this relationship. I believe this is because people want to honor my identity and respect my maleness, yet it feels uncomfortable and untrue… because it erases the fact that those images don't actually fit our queer relationship, and they don't include my trans-ness.

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My dress doesn't define me: How a tomboy learned to love taffeta

I have always been a tomboy. That's not to say that I've never worn a dress before; I do like to get "dressed up," but my definition of dressed up doesn't match most of society's definition. Now I love a pretty dress as much as the next girl, but trying to find a wedding gown that suited my personality and my budget was one of the hardest things about planning my wedding. I hated everything. I didn't want a formfitting dress but somehow I couldn't fit the notion of those giant cupcake dresses in with my lack of femininity.

3.8k

Big production proposals and being true to you

Like so many of you here on Offbeat Bride, I was never one of those girls who dreamed about what her wedding would be like. I never dreamed about getting married in a big white dress and having children and buying a home. My partner G knew this about me and was fine that I had no pointed interest in getting a ring on my finger on any sort of timeline. I'd said that many times over the first couple years together and one of the sweetest things he ever said was, "Well, if I thought you wanted to get married I would have asked you a long time ago. If you ever change your mind you'll have ask me. So after nearly six years together I did just that.