Officiating weddings for friends? Don't make this easy mistake


This meet-cute story turned galaxy wedding is truly our moon and stars
Photo by Federico Villaseñor from this wedding

Are you that friend who officiates all your friends' weddings? You're the one who's not afraid of public speaking, who knows how to hold the space for ceremony with both a lighthearted smile and a firm hand? You're the friend officiant who knows how to jike with the guests, but also can be sacred and serious face when needed? Maybe you did theater in college, or you're a lawyer, or you're just good at this sort of thing. Whatever: you're the friend officiant.

Over the years, we've shared all sorts of advice for how to officiate a friend's wedding, but if you're someone who friend officiates multiple weddings, here's one mistake you DON'T want to make. This was shared by an Offbeat Bride named Bobie Jo:

Just make sure you UPDATE the script from last time!!!! My bestie was my officiant, and she used the same script she read at her brother's wedding… During my wedding, she used her brother's wife's name instead of mine!!!!

Good thing I still think it’s hilarious and didn’t push her off the dock we were on…

So, this is a simple reminder to everyone who's friend officiating more than one wedding: do a quick document find-and-replace for the the names of your previous couple, and confirm that you've swapped in the new couples' names! It only takes a minute, and it'll save you from some major embarrassment on the day-of!

Need more tips for officiating a friend's wedding? We gotchoo!

  1. I've always co-written ceremony scripts with the couples I've married, so luckily this has never been a problem.

    However, I did screw up the marriage certificates for the first two friend weddings I officiated. I put the date of the ceremony where I was supposed to put the date that the license was granted. Doh! Luckily, both couples were understanding.

    Since then, I've always asked the couple to give me the certificate at the rehearsal. That way, I can fill it in ahead of time, when I'm able to focus. All that's left for the wedding itself is everybody's signatures.

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