Stress rehearsal: Why I’m saying goodbye to the wedding photo checklist

Guest post by Cynniebuns

While we have advice for the wedding photo checklist, we also recommend that sometimes you just throw it out completely…

I have a problem putting too much emphasis on details, and I have a tendency to be too detail-oriented. Through all this, my fiancé is like, “Why are you making simple things so complicated?” He also said at one point, “Why are you trying to cram in so many things into our wedding pictures, when you can just let things happen naturally?”

Then I remembered the last phone call with our wedding photographer, who told me that the logistics timeline I was providing is too rushed, and that it would affect the quality of work she would be providing.

Where did it go wrong?

I had wanted pictures of the bouquet toss, garter toss, cake-cutting, the first dance… Then it hit me. Pinterest and other brides' list of “photo must-haves” was killing our original vision of the wedding!

The wedding is really going to be a huge reason, finally, for our families to come together and celebrate. If I had missed elements that have been incorporated into others' weddings, it's not a big deal because this is our party.

That recent phone call with my photographer made me realize: capturing the moments as they happen takes time. That was what my photographer was trying to communicate while I was obsessing about my dream list of photo must-haves. While I was chatting to the photographer, another thing hit me — a previous co-worker's wedding advice: “The wedding day goes by so fast. Enjoy each moment.”

So, remembering that, I said to my photographer, “no more photo must-haves.” My fiancé and I hired a professional with a photo-journalistic approach: not intrusive, not in your face; very laid-back kind of photography.

This was a huge wake-up call, because I need to work with everyone to make this wedding as stress-free, but as fun as possible. To quote my fiancé: “Wedding planning does not have to be a stress rehearsal.”

I must repeat that 10 times daily. I may also abstain from reading wedding profiles as it can put unnecessary pressure and increase my anxiety levels/expectations. Our wedding day is not a production — it's the day when our families and closest friends get together to witness us cross a threshold of life-time commitment together.

So goodbye, wedding photo checklist! Let's just get married!

What “must-haves” are you releasing to keep your wedding lower stress?

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