One Offbeat Bride’s nightmare at Macy’s Bridal

Guest post by Siouxzi Rodeman

I get so many great emails from readers and someone of them are just meant to be shared with the world. Today, I wanted to share this email from Siouxzi, who had a nightmare dress shopping experience

macys bridal nightmare

Hey Ariel,
I wanted to say thanks I bought your book when we first got engaged. I really appreciated the anecdotes and advice. I thought I'd share what I'm going through right now with you.

My mother has stage IV lung cancer and also cancer in her pelvic bone. I don't say that for pity. It's just the situation we're in. My fiance and I never really did the whole on the knee surprise engagement. We'd decided drunkenly on night ages ago (I think this new year's maybe?) that we wanted to get married. My mother asked if we'd set a date, and the answer was no. We didn't even have an engagement ring. We saw it mostly as a thing for her to look forward to, maybe in two years.

Tuesday I got the call from my mom. The tumors are growing again, her lung was filled with fluid, they were going to drain it and start chemo on Friday. After a lot of crying and thinking and talking we decided to push up the wedding. To November 2007.

I've pretty much come to terms with all of that. And I'm so incredibly lucky to have great friends who are contributing in every way to help make our day as special as our relationship is. I have an incredible friend who is going to make my wedding gown. But first we wanted to try some on to see how they fit.

I'm definitely an offbeat bride. I'm pierced, tattooed and make dreads for burners, goths, ravers, and myself. So naturally, I expected some comments or whatever when I walked into a place, but I didn't expect this. My maid of honor and I went to Macy's. I've never been part of a bridal party, I had no idea I needed to make an appointment to try stuff on. So Jackie, my maid of honor took the lead, asking if we needed an appointment.

They said yes. (silence)

Jackie asked if they had any today, they said no. (silence)

Jackie asked if they had any this week, they said yes. (silence)

After way to much work to get them to try and find an hour for us to come by, they asked when the date was. We told them November 24th. Oh, wow, you know the date already, next November, blah blah. No, this November, we said.

And they laughed. Very much like the Dr. Demento show song, they laughed and laughed and then they laughed some more. And then they showed me the most hideous bridesmaid sample dresses walked away and we didn't see them again until we came out of that tiny closet.

To say I was upset is an understatement. I didn't cry in front of them because I refuse to let them to see me down. But I sure had a session later on. I'm not a princess bride. I don't need to have a tiara and be waited on hand and foot. But I'm sorry that my trying to have a wedding prior to my mom's death messes up the status quo wedding procedure. I'm not mad that they didn't have any appointments, though there were three consultants there and not a person other than us in site the whole time we were there.

I just don't see how laughing at a person, when you have no idea what their situation is, is acceptable behavior for a store like that. I was hurt at first but the more I think about it the angrier I am.

Sorry to write SO much. I just thought you might appreciate and relate and maybe have advice to others who find themselves not getting the wedding they wanted but trying to at least make it one they enjoy… and not turn into a
complete wreck in the process.

And BOO Macy's.

Comments on One Offbeat Bride’s nightmare at Macy’s Bridal

  1. I had a similar reception at Macy’s and they told me they never let anyone try on any dresses, unless they are sample size. In fact they looked at me like I was from Mars when I suggested that I might try on a dress. They did not even want to let me LOOK AT THE ONE DRESS I was supposed to buy. They pointed out they “probably don’t have it.” I was the only person in the whole place, and the dress ended up being on the first rack in the place. WHAT ASSHOLES.

  2. I am sorry for your loss but I will admit that bridal shops are nightmarish. This has been sufficient cause for me to definately make my own wedding gowns. Plural. My fiance and I are having two ceremonies, one at his families’ place and one at mine. One is just a vow renewal but will be just as ornate as the other and he does not want me wearing the same dress. Needless to say, being in a wheelchair has caused issues with these shops. Half of them are not accessible and the other half do not consider me human or something. Macy’s has been the best out where I am. It is just ridiculous

  3. When I worked bridal, I NEVER looked at anyone like she was crazy. I NEVER said “oh, you’re too fat to shop here”. I NEVER even blinked at the occasional tattoos and patchouli and hairy armpits we’d get in there. Never. It’s their wedding! The one day when every woman, regardless of size, lifestyle, body modification, whatever, should look gorgeous. No matter what she wears. I’m glad you had a talented friend who made that gorgeous dress for you. It breaks my heart that people can be that awful, but it makes my heart sing to see the pictures of your wedding and how happy you are.

  4. Hey girlie, just found you here.

    And that absolutely SUCKS. I have several reasons to despise Macy’s and this is just another one. George and I had a run-in with them when we were looking for my engagement ring. We were IGNORED for several minutes before someone had the time to talk to us and when they found out that we are on a budget, we never saw the woman again. Ended up with a 7-carat rose quartz cabochon that he picked up online from another vendor and I get nothing but compliments on it.

    Bridal shops, especially big-name ones, suck. I’ve been avoiding them like the plague.

    Hope to see you at our wedding in October.

  5. I can relate. I went out dress shopping for the first time today and decided to take a look around David’s Bridal. That was the first and last time I ever go into that store! I was just looking around when I was stopped by a very rude woman who said I could only look through the catalog and that I needed to have a “consultant” to actually see the dresses up close! I was only there for dress styles too – I don’t want a dress in white or ivory. And that was something no one in that store could comprehend.

  6. I too had a crappy customer service experience… Except I went shopping (just to look) when I was 7 months pregnant..It really shouldn’t matter how you look. Every girl should get the dress of her dreams.

    Good Luck!!! I hope everything turns out better than you imagined!

    p.s. I’m having my dress custom made.

  7. I was having similar trouble with looking at bridal shops, because I didn’t always have time to make an appointment or whatever, and I don’t NEED a whole barrage of women telling me personally that I am NOBODY if I don’t buy the priciest gown and matching cathedral veil. It is a nightmare. When I found the dress I loved, it was at a little silk shop in Portland, OR, where I could try on as many dresses as I wanted, and I happened to leave the same day with the dress in hand (because it happened to fit,) with the promise that I could come back for free alterations anytime. It was a relief, and the dress was so pretty I wanted to cry. It was grey silk, absolutely gorgeous, and cost about 1/4 of the other dresses I’d been eying. The people at David’s Bridal and Macy’s are going to have to answer to someone in the afterlife, and explain why they thought it was so funny to toy with people.

  8. I’m so sorry to hear all this. I was very lucky to find a small town shop with an open minded owner. She didn’t balk when I had my two boys with me. She’s a grandmother and played with the boys and let them run around. She had a tattoo herself (her son is an artist). I gave her my price- $300- and she found something perfect. If you’re in Western PA, send me a note and I’ll tell you where to go!

  9. Wow… sadly I’m not surprised about the way everyone has been treated at Macy’s. I work for a luxury retailer who specializes in fine china and bridal registries, and I have heard total nightmare stories from my brides about Macy’s. They’re just too big to really care about the customers and they probably pay so crappy that their sales people have an attitude and don’t want to work. I absolutely will boycott them at all costs.

    Other than David’s Bridal trying to sell me dresses I clearly told them I would not buy (I told them my budget was $300 or under and they kept giving me $600+ dresses to try on), they weren’t too bad. The consultant let me try on tons of dresses and was helpful and courteous. I ended up walking out with a clearance-priced pale yellow dress for $60.00. Sweeeet.

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