The Offbeat Bride: Kimberly, History Teacher
Her offbeat partner: Steve, Mechanic
Date and location of wedding: The Chatterbox Drive-In, Augusta, NJ — October 11, 2012
Our offbeat wedding at a glance: Since Steve is a mechanic and I'm a history teacher obsessed with all things pin-up, a theme with vintage cars and attire was a no-brainer. We wanted the ceremony and reception to be a little theatrical, including an Elvis officiant and lasers and smoke at the reception.
We had a cupcake tower instead of a cake, but also a huge candy buffet with assorted 1950s candy. My mother sat on the computer for hours on end trying to find all the era-appropriate candy that she could. It fit in pretty well with the 1950s diner aesthetic of The Chatterbox Drive-in.
Tell us about the ceremony: Our wedding party members had their own theme songs: Steve walked out to “Rock You Like a Hurricane,” his groomsmen walked out to the theme from Cops, my girls walked out to “Girls, Girls, Girls” and I walked out to Pantera's “Walk” with my uncle.
Here is an excerpt from the rumble-themed introduction to the ceremony:
Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, welcome to the greatest spectacle on earth that is Kim and Steve's wedding! Any reproduction or copy of this broadcast shall not be sold or distributed without prior written consent of the Chatterbox and/or the King of rock ‘n' roll himself. Introducing first, weighing in at a total combined weight of 762.3 pounds, the groomsmen! Introducing next, the challengers, weighing in at a combined weight at none of your damn business, the bridesmaids!
Now introducing the man, the myth, the legend… your groom, the one, the only…STEEEEVE! Now the moment we have all been waiting for, the baddest Catholic school teacher in all of New Jersey, the bride….KIIIIIIM!
Elvis: Listen up you two, I want a good clean fight. Keep all hands, feet, and objects to yourself, no hitting below the belt, no crying, no whining, no name-calling until you're married, and nobody tries to kill anybody until I say get it on. Now let's get it on!
Our biggest challenge: The biggest challenge we faced was having beloved relatives who were not present. Steve's mom passed about six years ago and my father about three years ago. There were no father/daughter dances or mother/son dances and I was really disappointed when I realized that. But I have to give props to my uncle for walking me down the aisle. He is like a second father to my brothers and me.
My funniest moment: Our first dance was Dusty Springfield's “I Only Wanna Be With You,” and it ripped out and Volbeat's cover started. As soon as the opening riff started, everyone who knew it was coming started jumping around and head banging like fools.
My advice for Offbeat Brides: If you're planning your wedding and are not a planner, make sure you keep a record of all your correspondence with vendors and who you talked to. There were times where I felt like I was given different information each time I talked to a vendor. So be diligent and keep that information handy.
Care to share a few vendor/shopping links?
- Photography: Sarah Salmon Photography
- Shoes: My Shoe Addiction
- Venue: The Chatterbox Drive-In
- Cupcakes: Miacakes
- Hair and makeup: Cutting Crew
- For the big girls who need decently priced undergarments: Catherines
- Fascinator: ForeverCherishDesign
Enough talk — show me the wedding inspo!