Offbeat Bride is good for moms, too! #Reader Mail#bouquet alternatives#family#family drama#mother of the bride Updated Oct 12 2015 (Posted Apr 21 2008) Ariel arielmstallings Photo by Chris Hazard, PhotoHazard.com Hi, Ariel. I just wanted to express thanks to you for saving me from my mother. She had been pestering me to carry flowers, which I had absolutely no interest in at all, whatsoever. After many impassioned pleas and fights, I decided to email her a link to Offbeat Bride — particularly the response you wrote to the girl who didn't want to carry anything on her trip down the aisle. My mother called me and told me that she had never even considered that flowers were optional — it just seemed like something you had to do. Long story even longer, she spent an hour perusing Offbeat Bride and told me how much fun it all looked like, and how she just assumed since she had always seen things done a particular way, it had never occurred to her that it didn't have to be that way. I don't know how you managed to get it across to her, but you've not only opened her eyes, you've helped me to be more understanding of where she's coming from. Thank you so much for making this ridiculous and incredibly arduous process a little bit more human, and a little bit less stressful. -Trish P.S.: When I walk down the aisle with no flowers in hand, I will be secretly whispering "Thank you, Ariel!" Aww, you're so welcome Trish … and Trish's mom! 🙂 I'm actually curious if there are any other mothers-of-the-offbeat-bride reading. Mamas, are you out there? Ariel Author of three editions of the Offbeat Bride book and the forthcoming From Shitshow To Afterglow, Ariel Meadow Stallings acts as the publisher of all the Offbeat Empire websites. She lives in Seattle with her son, and if she's not reading or writing books, chances are good that she's dancing or happy-crying. She writes weekly essays for her new publication, The Afterglow. PREVIOUS Kat's Ottawa wedding was all about the offbeat details NEXT Rachel & Ali's wedding food makes me say OM NOM NOM Show/Hide comments [ 16 ] I directed my mom to this site this weekend…While she was initially slightly horrified by the term "wedding porn" (I think she had something entirely different pop into her head!) and was slightly uncomfortable about all of the ink covered brides, she thought overall that the site was awesome, and "very very Julie." It made her happy to see so many women thinking outside of the proverbial wedding box! Reply That is so awesome! A Mom has a complete turn around thanks to Offbeat Bride! Yippee! P.S. the term wedding porn cracks me up and it cracks me up even more that I provided sponsored wedding porn! Reply What, am I the first Mom to post a reply? Yes, I'm reading! Daughter dear is well on the way to being an offbeat bride … but I was one before her, in 1980, at a wedding in 1620's clothing (think Three Musketeers.) You have a great site! Reply My bad-ass future mother-in-law just finished reading Offbeat Bride (she bought her own copy), and loved it! I don't think she's been to the site, but she knows I reference it. She's recommended the book to many of her family members so that they understand what to expect at our 5-day long, 6th-grade-camp-with-beer wedding. We're lucky. Our parents are very supportive of our wedding being OURS. Reply I've often mentioned Offbeat Bride to my mom, and now every time we are at a DIY impasse she suggests that I ask those girls on the internet what they think. Reply When we told my mom that we were engaged, I gave her a copy of Offbeat Bride, wrapped in wedding paper. I wrote nice things on the inside cover so she definitely won't be getting rid of it! I told her before we started any wedding planning she had to read the book first. She was so devastated when she left the book at a hockey ice rink but she got it back. Mission accomplished! Reply I think my mom pops by sometime! I read her excerpts from the book and I gave her the URL for this site. I also have shown her some particularly interesting posts. I HOPE she reads it! It works out well though, and she understands that our wedding is going to be offbeat! Reply Yup Us MOB's are out here and LOVING this site, My daughter sent me here went she first started planning her big day and I have been addicted ever since. All the wonderful wedding porn makes me wish I had been a more headstrong bride and not listened to others, told them all to go to hell and done things MY way. So heres to you Ariel and ALL of you amazing offbeat brides I love you all!!! Reply Another MOB checking in…LOVE this site. Darling daughter is getting married 06.07.08 and I want to be the one to introduce this to HER!! Reply I was MOB last fall, and a mixed media artist. A customer referenced this site, and I just LOVE the spirit and unusual ways couples are able express themselves-KUDOS to all! Reply I plan on giving your book to BOTH my future MIL and my mom when my long suffering boyfriend and I finally get engaged – right now I'm taking bets between which one will be more stuck on us doing things 'the right way'… Reply how about a M-o-t-FG – dsnt look like a good acronym. anyway, son-1 isnt engaged yet,hence the Future Groom, but he and his female counterpart are waiting until the education is finished (YES!) still, I am a planner and will be doing either the rehearsal dinner or, depending on her Asian-American family's participation, maybe everything! this site has so many great ideas I am even re-considering my mate's idea to renew our vows. although we had an off-beat wedding just about everything went wrong and, even though the groom did wear leather poants, the day was not fun – not even close. part of the problem was that people just did not understand that yes, we did want a medieval wedding, yes, we did want a pig roast, no we didnt want crepe paper bells, wedding favors, out of season flowers and – well, you know how it is. a big part of why I am interested is that I want to be able to help my children and their future brides have the celebration they want when the time comes. thanx everyone for sharing inspiration and ideas and thanx Ariel for creating a place to do that!! Reply I'm a mom who follows this site! My daughter is getting married in June (next month, omg!) and I am always forwarding OBB articles to her. I have found tons of cool ideas and common sense answers here, and it truly is fun to see all the wonderfully different weddings! Reply I'm a mom that introduced my daughter to this site. First, it was my turn to get blissfully married in my own off beat way. Now I'm reading it to try to find ideas for what to wear to my daughter's wedding this fall. "Anything you want!" is the only guideline. Any ideas? Brides, what would you like to see your mother wear (or not wear) to your beautiful rustic mountain wedding? Reply My mother was convinced that the bridesmaids had to match, otherwise it will look messy up front. I showed her a link that had a collection of mis-matched bridesmaids, and she realized they didn't have to match. I gave our wedding party free reign of what to wear with a vague color scheme and formality, and they all ended up wearing the same color anyway! =] Reply My own mother actually directed me here! Reply Join the conversation Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Comment Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Sign me up for your offbeat awesomeness newsletter! No-drama comment policy Part of what makes the Offbeat Empire different is our commitment to civil, constructive commenting. Make sure you're familiar with our no-drama comment policy. Biz owners & wedding bloggers Please just use your real name in your comment, not your business name or blog title. Our comments are not the place to pimp your website. If you want to promote your stuff on Offbeat Bride, join us as an advertiser instead.