For a long time, I had this idea in my head that more people at your wedding was “better.” Like it meant more people cared about you, or maybe it was a sign of social status, I guess. So why would anyone have a small wedding?
After attending a wedding with under 100 people, all of whom truly loved and cared about that bride and groom, and attending a wedding with 200 people that were sort of friends with the bride and groom… I've started cutting my guest list like it's my job.
The problem: There's no way my future husband and I can cut our guest list to under 100 people. We probably can't even get it below 175, if we're gonna be honest. He has a fracking large family, and he's from a small town where it's a personal dig to not be invited to everyone's weddings and other shenanigans.
So how do we make our wedding feel small and intimate without being able to cut the guest list? I think we discovered the answer…
My friends' small wedding was so full of love, and they really made all of their guests feel like each one was a critical piece of who they were as a couple. As we left the wedding, my future husband said to me that he really felt honored to be there.
I realize that our larger wedding can also have the same feeling as long as we give off a feel that says “We are glad that YOU, specifically YOU, are here.”
So we've thought about writing each person (or couple/family/whatever) a hand-written message inside of their seating card for the reception, thanking them for taking the time to be there with us.
We're also doing a “community vow” thing in our ceremony, where the officiant asks everyone there if they will support us through this journey, etc., and they respond.
Do y'all have any more tips on making a large wedding feel smaller and more intimate?