Category Archive


How do you feel about your wedding? What does it all mean? How does wedding planning a metaphor for the rest of your life?

Offbeat-er than thou

I belong to a community of brides on another site. One of the brides prides herself on her uniqueness and originality. No one has a problem with that. But she really puts down a lot of the other brides who are more traditional. She calls their weddings ‘cookie cutter’ — which really hurts some people’s feelings! How can I tell someone to chill with their “I’m so original and different” superiority trip?

Commitment without the marriage

I don’t need a white dress to feel pretty, and I have no desire to pretend I’m virginal. I don’t need to have Jeff propose to me as if he’s chosen me. I don’t need a ring as a daily reminder to myself or others that I am loved. And I don’t need Jeff to […]

Not so offbeat after all

People planning alternative weddings sometimes think that by having an alternative wedding they’re automatically avoiding the scariness that comes with the Great White. But the same sort of problems apply…

Your wedding is not a contest

The dirty flip-side of “my wedding is too weird” is “my wedding isn’t weird enough.” Both sentiments make me sad because your wedding is not a contest.

When people don’t think you’re excited enough about your wedding

I do not feel squealy and elated when I talk about my wedding, and this seems to disappoint (and sometimes even upset) other people. How can I address others’ unsolicited wedding enthusiasm without seeming negative or rude?