How I handled pressure from family during wedding planning

We just have so many people who are SO STOKED to FINALLY be able to do things that they've always wanted and expected to be able to do at a wedding! As wedding planning went on, juggling all of those dearly held expectations and figuring out how to handle pressure from family became more and more a part of our wedding planning process…

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Do I need to invite someone's adult daughter to my intimate wedding?

My sister wants us to invite her boyfriend's adult daughter to our wedding, even though we've never met her. Her family already accounts for five invitations for her household already.

We have worked so hard to keep our wedding small and intimate and quite frankly don't want a stranger there. Are we being selfish?

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How do we communicate that we sincerely want no wedding gifts?

When it comes to gift-giving, the general consensus among my peers is that you give what you can, if you wish. As far as we're concerned, your presence is present enough — especially considering that we are a bunch of broke Millennials.

My extended family, however, hardcore-believes in tangible gifts. Some of them are sticklers for the traditional (and comfortably middle-class) notion of extensive and expensive gifts at shower, hen party, and wedding. It's generous, but also uncomfortable, at odds with our values, and not always string-free. How can I discourage gifts at my wedding?