I'm five weeks out from my wedding, and I'm still missing about 30% of my RSVPs. We won't get into why it's so hard for people to send in a pre-addressed stamped card, send an email, type out a text, or make a phone call, but we all know it is.
Lucky for you, I've learned a couple of things in the process of thinking about how to chase people down…
Set a deadline that's two weeks prior to when you need it
Get wedding guests to RSVP on time with a secret deadline
Something I see all the time is people sighing/complaining/fretting because their RSVP date has come and gone, yet only 50 of the 200 people invited... Read more
If my deadline had been two weeks ago, I would have had a buffer. I would have had time to chase people down without feeling stressed about it. Instead, my RSVP deadline isn't for another week, but my mail has slowed significantly and I'm not really expecting all of the replies to come back as soon as I need them.
Use Facebook lists
Don't know how? See this post. The beauty of the Facebook list is that no one knows they're on it. I created a list with all the people who hadn't RSVP'd, and posted a chipper status reminding “everyone” to send in their responses by the card, email, or Facebook message, and just made that status private to everyone on the list. I got more cards over the next few days, and a couple Facebook messages. I also didn't harass people over Facebook who either already sent in their response or weren't invited in the first place, and I didn't have to call anyone out by name.
Get your parents involved
Most of the missing RSVPs were our parents' people, not ours. Extended family, family friends, etc. So we sent out the following email to each parent (we have five sets; complicated family tree):
Dear [Parent],
We're sending each parent a list of “their” people who haven't yet RSVP'd. We'd really appreciate your help in tracking them down!
- The Smiths
- Aunt Patsy
- Uncle Bob
- The Hamiltons
- The Lambs
Thanks and love you, Thymeonmyside and future-husband
That netted me an email from my future father-in-law telling me that everyone in North Dakota was not coming, but expressing his shock that they hadn't RSVP'd; a text from my dad saying he would talk to his siblings this week, but that my aunt was coming alone; some Facebook messages from my mom's friends, to whom I assume she just forwarded my email; and a much calmer bride.
I know that these tactics won't take care of everyone. I'll still have to start chasing people down individually in a week or so, but these strategies really have lightened my load.
What other creative ways have you come up with to hunt down your errant RSVPs?
