Krys & Chris' Scottish picnic wedding in the Redwoods • Offbeat Wed (was Offbeat Bride)

The Offbeat Bride: Krys, User Experience Designer (and Tribesmaid)

Her offbeat partner: Chris, Artist and Stunt Performer

Date and location of wedding: Sanborn County Park, Saratoga, CA — 06/30/2013

Our offbeat wedding at a glance: We wanted to have a lot of people join us, but we were working with a $5K for everything. So, we decided to make it a picnic wedding in a County Park (both of us love the outdoors), and make almost everything ourselves. We bought our clothing and the cake was made by the amazing Laurie Clarke of Sweet Celebrations, but everything else, we handled with the help of almost all of our friends.

It felt weird to have flowers just to throw them away afterwards, so we made all the flowers from fabric and paper. We put them in vases filled with origami paper stars instead of water. Between us and our friends, I think we made about 10,000 paper stars.

Tell us about the ceremony:
Neither of us is religious, so we had our dear friend Peter perform the ceremony. He wrote it based on a mixture of traditions that he thought fit our personalities. He started with something he called “The Witnesses' Creed,” in which he asked everyone watching to vow to support us, advise us, and help us through the tough times.

Then, we had some friends of ours who have been married for 27 years each read pieces we love. Peter had us repeat some vows after him. I had been very clear that there would be no “obey” in the vows, and he winked at me as we finished up.

At the end of the ceremony, after he presented us, he said. “Now, we have one last, small ritual to perform to make this ceremony complete. As you can probably tell, these guys have a love for history and tradition. This final, sacred tradition was born A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far, Far Away…”

This was the cue for our “in the know” guests to pull their lightsabers out of hiding, power up, and form an arch for us to pass through. None of the other guests had any clue that was going to happen, so it was a total surprise.

Our biggest challenge:
Because the whole wedding was DIY, we had a crew of people with assigned jobs for the day of. We figured that if we spread the work among lots of people, it wouldn't be a huge burden on any one person. We also had a few people show up that had no assigned jobs, and it's a good thing because we needed them.

My favorite moment:
Because my father passed away six years ago, my mother gave me away. When we got to the end of the aisle she gave me a huge hug and I almost started crying before the wedding even started!

During the speeches, my stepfather spoke and said that it felt like my father was here with us, and that he'd be proud. I had been sucking in the tears all day but that totally launched the flood. It was absolutely the perfect thing he could have said.

My funniest moment:
During the reception, instead of a bouquet toss, we shot the bouquet out of a trebuchet. When we practiced it a few days before the wedding. The bouquet flew 40 feet and it was really spectacular. However, on the wedding day, it decided to fizzle! We lined all the single ladies up 40 feet away, told everybody to expect a big sweeping arch, and pulled the string to fire. It plopped to the ground 15 feet in front, making all the ladies race forward to scoop it up. And wouldn't you know that my 17-year-old daughter was the one to catch it? I nearly went gray right then and there.

Also, instead of me wearing the garter, Chris wore it. And he ROCKED that Batman garter.

Have you been married before and if so, what did you do differently?
Chris was married once before in a secret elopement. It broke his best friend's heart to not be included, because they've been besties for 30 years, and as boys growing up had always promised they'd be each other's best men. They had long since gotten past that disappointment, but it was still incredibly touching to see the last bit of healing take place while we all stood there together during the ceremony.

What was the most important lesson you learned from your wedding?
We knew to have a day-of coordinator who kept everything running on schedule and everyone happy. What I didn't know, was that there needed to be one calm, cool rock of stability for me, too. My bridesmaid Michelle stepped in and played that role like a champ. She kept us all supplied with mimosas and pragmatism. From the moment I arrived, she was next to me, smiling and reassuring, reminding me that everything was going fine, feeding me information from outside the room where I was sequestered.