Three offbeat bride questions get answered this time:

• Can I have multiple wedding showers in different cities?
• Do I have to have his bratty niece in the ceremony?
• And if I’m keeping my last name, how should we be presented after the ceremony?

I’ve been searching the net for different types of invitations that are cheap, cute and individual, but if i have to see one more invitation with roses or hearts on it I’m gonna puke!

Any ideas on how to come up with something that wont break the budget, or a site that has different choices, Thanks, Lexy

Easiest question ever. Etsy.com is the solution, m’dear Lexy. Tons of options from dozens of artists, none of them with hearts or roses. Your money goes straight to a crafty type, and you get truly unique invitations. Etsy Wedding has a few invitation highlights.

(Also, there are some great DIY invite ideas on the OBB social network!)

My partner and I have decided to only have our siblings in the wedding party, which is great. However, I have a great friend that I would like to include in some sort of role of honor. Any ideas what this role could be? — MP

I would ask this friend what role s/he would like to play, and maybe give him/her a few ideas and suggested titles. Some of my favorite wedding titles include Bridal Bodyguard, Wedding Captain, and Wedding Henchmen, but there are a MILLION of them.

Basically, figure out what magical skill your friend has to contribute, and then build a special role for him/her around that skill. Are they a poet? Have ‘em open the ceremony with a reading! Are they an organizational fiend? Appoint them Lead Wedding Tyrant! Can they cook? Then clearly they’re the Feastmaster. Are they sort of unskilled but gorgeous and you really want them to be front and center at the wedding? Have them be the Illuminator, starting the ceremony off by lighting candles and incense. Designate them to hold your vows up while you read, acting as Wedding Notary.

There are as many great roles for someone in your wedding as their are amazing people in your life. Have fun picking a good title for them, and letting them run with their special skill! Just make sure you find some great way to acknowledge them, whether it’s in the ceremony, in the first toast of the night, or some other way to hold them up and tell the world just how much they mean to you.

Our wedding party consists of Matt’s brother and two of his buddies, and my cousin/childhood best friend (as “the best woman”) and my four brothers (as my “bridesmen”). Any tips on how to incorporate 9 men into a wedding? The only chicks are me and my best woman, Jenna, and my baby cousin (she’ll be a 2 1/2 year old flower girl). In addition to the nine men, we have 4 little boys who will be taking part. A sausage-heavy wedding for sure! We’re full of ideas, but I was wondering what cool offbeat ones you could add. -Shauna

A couple ideas:

• Have all those groomsmen and bridesboys carry you down the aisle on a palanquin.
• Give them fabulous titles and jobs like “Lead Camp Counselor,” “Wedding Captain,” “King of Ushers” (Lord of Ushing?), and give them all walkie-talkies. Or perhaps secret service sunglasses and ear-bugs?
• Have some of them act as candle lighters, complete with blowtorches and/or flame-throwers
• In terms of the ceremony, if you’re planning a traditional “his/hers” wedding party altar situation, have your bridesboys stand on your side.

Offbeat brides, any other ideas?

So, here’s an experiment for you — instead of writing my advice, I decided to try just doing it via video. Lemme know what you think of the format.

My fiancé’s family (mother, father, brother etc.) are protesting our wedding. They say it is not because of us, it is because they do not believe in gay marriage (ass-holes!) How do we go about filling in the holes? we are both very close with my family and they will be playing major roles in the wedding. We are having a hard time incorporating my family without putting a huge red spotlight on my fiancé’s lack of family. For clarification, my fiancé considers herself the Groom, and me the Bride, which only matters in terms of roles her family would have filled. -Lara

I’ve spent the last two days scouring the ‘net for a father/daughter dance for our wedding reception, and frankly, virtually every suggestion I’ve come across has a title that makes me throw up in my mouth a little like “Daddy’s Little Girl” or “Butterfly Kisses.”

I’m not opposed to sentimental songs but perhaps none with the bride=angel/child/doll theme I can’t seem to get away from. He’s a 60s/70s Classic/Southern rock kinda guy. There’s gotta be something out there about years going by, getting older, moving on… I just can’t seem to find it. This
is one of the few traditions we’re actually keeping, so I’d like to find something right for us. —Sharon

Yeah, nothing like the creepy incest themes that seem to come up with father/daughter dances, hmm? That’s part of why I skipped the tradition, but I do agree that with the right song it can be a nice moment. Here are a few non-icky song ideas:

Loudon Wainwright’s “Daughter”(hear it)
10,000 Manaics “How You’ve Grown” (hear it)
Ben Folds’ “Still Fighting It” (hear it)

If you’re looking for even more, the playlist from WFUV’s father’s day show might give you some great ideas.

Offbeat brides: got any suggestions? Leave ‘em in the comments!

PS: Extra bonus awesome points if you can carry off something like this.

Hi Ariel! I absolutely love your hair in your wedding photos. The ribbons are fabulous! While I wouldn’t do the exact same thing, I would love something with the ribbons or something like it. I don’t even know where to begin looking for either someone to do my hair for me or how I might possible do it myself. Do you have any suggestions? — Alicia

Hey, Alicia — it’s super easy to do your hair yourself if you go for ribbon falls like I did.

I had two pairs of falls, which were essentially just big elastic hair-ties with organza ribbon, yarn, and strips of fabric tied on to them. Seriously, that’s all they were. They’re super easy to make: get some big thick hair ties and buy some nice ribbon, and just tie the ribbon onto the ties. Tada! As for how to attach them, that’s a bit more complicated — but not much.

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My fiancé gave me an engagement ring that I absolutely love. It is a unique eco-friendly band accompanied by a nice rock which is really just icing on the cake and just that. What I really value is the artistic design of the band itself as no two designs are alike.

When I shared my new engagement ring excitement with a girlfriend, I explained to her the artistic design/eco materials’ significance of the ring. She interrupted and asked what size my rock was. Upon learning that I have a 1carat diamond, she then complained to her man for not getting her a diamond of such size. She appeared to have no interest in my story of the ring design itself and was only concerned with rock sizes. How do I politely school/check other people who are obviously unappreciative of art, eco-friendly design and are more concerned with what is on top? —Rebecca

First, a slight caution: you’re walking a delicate line when call attention to something (in this case a ring) and then get frustrated when people don’t admire it in the ways you want. You add an extra layer of complexity when you discuss the size of the diamond you supposedly don’t care about.

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