The offbeat bride: Monika A, Fluevog Asst Manager, Professional Tarot Reader and part time vegan baker

Her offbeat partner: Carter , build and release computer engineer

Location & date of wedding: Hakone Gardens, Saratoga , CA — September 20, 2009

What made our wedding offbeat: When a Pagan, tarot reading, Fluevog Pimpette decides to marry a Floridian, blond/blue eyed, computer geek, atheist, your wedding has to be offbeat! We found our middle ground in having the wedding in an amazing Japanese Garden, which was alive with nature and her beauty. We did almost everything ourselves and don't regret any part of the year of collecting cutlery, making cherry blossom center pieces, and searching Craigslist for the perfect table cloths.

Continue reading "Monika & Carter's Neo-Victorian, Pagan-Atheist, Japanese, Peacock, Love Fest" →

The offbeat bride: Emily, Geologist & General Rock Geek

Her offbeat partner: Dave, Environmental Consultant

Location & date of wedding: The deck of my parent's cottage in central Alberta, Canada on June 5th, 2009

What made our wedding offbeat: We both really wanted to have a party with all of our family and friends. The actual ceremony lasted less then 10 minutes, but the party lasted for three days.

Continue reading "Emily & Dave's Rainy Cabin Potluck Wedding" →

The Offbeat Bride: Jessi (aka. "Cupcake" or OBT member "Cupcake Pharaoh") — massage therapist/artist/pet sitter extraordinaire!

Her Offbeat Partner: Sean (aka. "Sweetpea") — Grocery Store Manager and scooter aficionado

Location & date of wedding: The Albuquerque Press Club (and Highland park below it), Albuquerque NM — May 16th, 2009

What made our wedding offbeat: We wanted four things for our wedding: cheap, green, local and fun! The ceremony was in a local park (free and green), and the reception was in the Albuquerque Press Club which is a really cool log cabin that was built in 1903 (also pretty cheap and definitely fun). We have our monthly scooter club meetings there, so we were very comfortable with the club. Not to mention it has a bar, pool table, ping pong, darts, and arcade game!!

Continue reading "Jessi & Sean's Outdoor Vintage Scooter Wedding" →

The Offbeat Bride: Rae, Graphic Artist

Her Offbeat Partner: Nate

Location & date of wedding: Ridge and Valley Gun Club, Coopersburg PA — the wedding was 2/2/09 & the party was on 5/16/09

What made our wedding offbeat: Money was a complete issue for our wedding, so we decided early on that we wanted to get married ourselves and have a party for our families on another date. We went to the local judge's house where he performed the marriage in his living room. It was something that I will never forget!

Continue reading "Rae & Nate's DIY, Potluck, Gun Club wedding" →

I am planning on having an informal family-only wedding at my dad's church. I'm considering doing a potluck wedding but was wondering if that was tacky to ask our guest to dish something up for everyone to share in.

My fiancee is in Afghanistan and we'll only know a month in advance when we can set a date for the wedding. This makes catering (already expensive) even more of a challenge. If I where to do a potluck, how would I word it on an invitation? I run the risk of people not bringing anything!

I've read articles online and it seems most people think potlucks are tacky — even my own sister thinks it's too tacky. -Sylvia

Ok, first thing's first: Yes, a potluck wedding is tacky. Your entire wedding is tacky! So was mine. "Tacky" is a subjective word that can be applied to absolutely anything and everything, from a $500 wedding all the way to a $50,000 wedding. It's all tacky, so let that concern go.

I've featured several potluck weddings on Offbeat Bride — I especially love Kirsten's story, where she explains:

We invited our friends and family to "bring what makes them who they are" to share. We had no idea what our wedding would look like — we were not disappointed. A beautiful and delicious homemade wedding cake just APPEARED OUT OF NOWHERE! Our friends sang, read stories, played music, put on improv performances, made up carnival games, and told each other's families waaaaay too much about the new in laws!

So clearly, a potluck wedding can work beautifully and be an amazing community event that celebrates two families coming together and sharing food, stories, music, and whatever else people chose to bring. I love the idea.

But the issue isn't "is a potluck wedding tacky?" and more "Are you and your fiance's families comfortable enough with the idea to participate fully?" Only you two know your families well enough to know if this is the case. Here are a few questions for you and your fiance to ask yourselves:

Continue reading "Is a potluck wedding tacky?" →