I'm having a dilemma about armpit hair. I haven't shaved my hairies in YEARS, and I really don't want to, but I'm feeling totally out on my own here! Have you got any advice or photos for brides considering rocking the pit hair on their wedding day? -Kit

This is a deeply personal (and dare I say political!) decision, so while I can't give you a cut 'n' dry answer I can provide a few questions from a few different angles can help you make the decision for yourself…

Continue reading "Should I shave my armpits for my wedding day?" →

Recommended reading from the Globe & Mail today: I took my wife's last name by Josiah Neufeld:

So far the name change hasn't cost me more than a few hours of paperwork, some explanations to public officials and a few strained conversations with brittle relatives who think I've joined a matrilineal cult. I still feel like myself. My identity remains intact. Marriage will demand larger sacrifices than this, I expect.

Read the full article, and thanks to Michelle for passing this my way.

That's the question that Jezebel.com asked this weekend, and I figure maybe I should give my answer.

Continue reading "Is having an offbeat wedding any different than having a traditional wedding?" →

The offbeat bride: Lith, Pregnancy and Postpartum Doula

Her offbeat partner: Ealesy, Community Corrections Officer

Location & date of wedding: Tecoma Pavilion in the Royal Botanic Gardens, Melbourne, Australia on February 24th, 2007

What made our wedding offbeat: I planned our wedding in a total of 9 days! Our wedding was not a legally recognised ceremony. We had a friend facilitate the ceremony because we did not want our "marriage" recognised because our nation does not permit same sex couples to marry.

Continue reading "Lith & Ealesy's Formal Feminist *Not Legal* Wedding" →

Last week's Why you should propose to your boyfriend post was a big hit, so I'm continuing on with Part 2: HOW to propose to your boyfriend.

Of course there are as many ways to propose to your boyfriend as their are people reading this website, but when considering proposing, here are a few things to consider:

1. Have lots of conversations with him about marriage and commitment, so that you know you're on the same page. Do you share ideas and values? Do you share a common outlook? Do you both want to do this?
2. If you're not sure he'd feel comfortable being proposed to, find a casual way to find out. Share a story about another woman who proposed (I've got one coming up for you!) to see how he responds.
3. If you want to really twist the tradition on its ear, consider asking his mother for his hand in marriage! This list of how to ask a man for his daughter's hand in marriage is actually pretty helpful, and has the bonus of being slightly amusing when you flip the genders: "Promise [her] that you’ll take care of [her son] for the rest of [his] life."
4. Pick a symbolic gift, if you want one. It totally doesn't have to be a ring (who remembers the "engagement lighter" mentioned in my book?)
5. Start scheming! The web is FILLED with proposal ideas, but I'm guessing crafting one unique to your relationship would be way more special than any over-engineered feat of romance.

Want a great story to use as an example? Keep hear how one OBT member proposed to her boyfriend…

Continue reading "Proposing Part 2: How to propose to your boyfriend" →