feeling competitive | Offbeat Bride

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Photobooth photo by Tom Couture

I am confused.

I am confused by the attitude that surrounds weddings and costs and ideas and things. Maybe that's what makes me offbeat — I have this habit of loving everyone and being insanely optimisic even when it's probably not warranted. I give second chances. I love and trust until given reason not to. Every new person I meet, and can carry at least a five minute conversation, I say is my new best friend. I write a daily blog about something happy that happened to me that day.

My problem lies in all the intense bitchiness that lives in the wedding world. "My wedding is better than yours because of such-and-such" and all of the things that go into such a feeling.

I was reading a blog where a woman commented that she had a courtroom wedding and blames opulent weddings for the high divorce rate.

Then there are the haters on both sides of the world. My wedding (and marriage) are better than yours because I chose to have a BBQ instead of a five course sit down meal. [At Offbeat Bride, we call this "one-lowsmanship" -Eds] My wedding (and marriage) are better than yours because I paid for three party rooms and the ghost of Louis Armstrong to sing our first song.

Can we all just chill the fuck out and be nice to each other for like… five and a half seconds?

Friends, pull up a chair, because we have something we need to talk about today: JUDGEY-NESS. You know what I'm talking about: that smirky, snarky, eye-rolly feeling that comes up. There you are, attending a friend's wedding. Or even more likely, there you are: looking at pictures on the internet. And suddenly, what's that? TUT-TUT, did she REALLY!? Oh my lands, SHE DID. Can you beLIEVE? I would never! It blows my mind that anyone could possibly think this was a good idea. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

We all do it, and it's fine — but every time you get all judgey about someone else, you're missing a chance to learn something valuable about yourself.

Engagement ring envy — the stuff of legend and myth? Or a nasty side effect of being engaged and the wedding industrial complex? Since the holidays are a popular time to propose, we thought we'd share Offbeat Bride reader Sarah's thoughts as she delves into her inner psyche and explores the deep annals of her engagement ring envy demons.

Is "offbeat" the new Martha? Are you trendy by trying to have a nontraditional wedding? Join me as I ramble about my thoughts on this, web stats, subcultures, anniversaries, and awesome blossoms.

Oh, so you're having a bit of the green eyed monster about someone else's Dr. Who themed wedding? Let's talk about jealousy…

DIY is everywhere now, there's TV stations, magazines, books and blogs dedicated to it. What they don't tell you is, this stuff isn't all sunshine and kitten farts. But I will!

The Offbeat Bride: Tiffany, Librarian (and OBT member "TippyLooHoo") Her Offbeat Partner: Brandon, Electrician Location & date of wedding: Friday the 13th, March 2009 Kilworth...

"We're thinking of having all our parents walk us down the aisle together," you say to a friend, and then watch for a smile or a twitch of the eyelid. Did that smile mean they like it? Or did it mean they're just being nice? Shit, I can't tell! Now I think I'm going to have an anxiety vomit all over the floor!