Welcome to another installation of OMGOBT!, the series where I share some of my favorite content from the OBT. This post comes to you from OBT member Rodrigues.

I have been pondering ways to keep my family involved in my wedding yet respectful of our wishes. I almost feel like it is harder to plan a “mostly traditional with some personal twists” style wedding than a totally off-the-wall affair, mostly because if you are having the latter, it seems friends and family will eventually resign themselves to the fact that you are unequivocally NOT going to have the wedding they want.

Because our wedding appears fairly traditional on the surface, the changes we’re making are confusing the hell out of my parents, making them think that we are only changing certain things to spite them.

Continue reading "How to keep family off your back, by Rodrigues" →

Welcome to OMGOBT, a new category of posts on Offbeat Bride that feature some of the most inspiring, most helpful, and most awesome posts from the OBT. This first installment involves love and cat vomit, and is by OBT user Cassie.

So the other day I was looking at my cat. More specifically, I was looking at my cat as she spewed what seemed like a quarter pound of half-digested tuna/chicken feast all over one of my favorite sweaters, which I stupidly left unsupervised on the bed. And I thought, "Sweet lord above this cat is driving me crazy, what with all the puking and crapping lately, but I love her to bits and wouldn't give her up for anything."

And here is where the most pathetic realization came over me: My relationship with my future husband is like my relationship to the cat …

Continue reading "How my cat taught me marriage isn't so scary after all, by Cassie" →

The offbeat bride: Kelly, Writer and TESL Teacher
Her offbeat partner: Francis, Web Designer

Location & date of wedding: Stone Mansion in Rome, NY - May 24th, 2008

What made our wedding offbeat: Both of our families are super Catholic and we are not, so we decided on a outdoor handfasting. The ceremony was presided over by a Catholic woman who was excommunicated for belonging to a church that ordains women and marries same sex couples.

Continue reading "Kelly & Francis' 1920's Old Hollywood Wedding!" →

Where is my manual on throwing a wedding with a partner who is transgender?! Both of us previously identified as lesbians, but now it's "Hey, I don't have a girlfriend anymore but a boyfriend, but I'm still gay, but we're getting legally married as male and female, but but but…" Do I let guests show up and see my big queer event with my male partner and have them think whatever they want? -Becky

Hey, Becky. I've got my answer, but first I'm bringing in the expertise of Elroi Windsor, who Offbeat Bride readers may remember from this inspiring queer wedding. Elroi is an Instructor and Doctoral Student of Sociology at Georgia State University with a focus on gender issues, and this was hir perspective:

Becky really should just deal with everything up front, before the wedding, so she doesn't have to deal with it during. That way, she'll only have people present who support her and her partner.

If everyone knows her as a lesbian, and knew the couple as a lesbian couple, then she needs to explain to everyone what's up if she wants them at the wedding. It's up to her to set the limits about what's ok and not ok to ask about when she relays the news.

Continue reading "Transgender groom" →

Some of you may remember this groom, in his amazing vintage tux — well, here's the full story!

The offbeat bride: Maria, Success Coach

Her offbeat partner: Luke, Fraud Specialist

Location & date of wedding: Rotture: Portland, OR- August 31st, 2008

What made our wedding offbeat: Geeze, what wasn't offbeat would have been an easier question. The wedding was concert themed, meaning we got married on stage, to music, in a show venue, distributed tickets, handbills, etc. So many things made this wedding *us*. From our garb (giant red dress & powder blue vintage tux) to the venue (an old warehouse converted into a show venue), to the homemade cupcakes and home-arranged flowers, we managed to get everything we wanted, for dirt cheap, and still made it all look really good.

Continue reading "Maria & Luke's Hispano-Hipster Dance Party Wedding!" →

The offbeat bride: Michelle, Woodshop Maven

Her offbeat partner: Jason, Clockmaker

Location & date of wedding: Friend's backyard in Audubon PA, near Philly. July 19, 2008

What made our wedding offbeat: We wanted a wedding that was simple, low budget, and entirely ours. Our budget was very modest but we had complete editorial control. Also, we wanted COSTUMES!!! Not just for the bride and groom or for a genre, but a costume party for everyone with free food and booze for all.

Continue reading "Michelle & Jason's costume party picnic extravaganza" →

Well, that didn't take long! As seen on OBB yesterday, here's the full scoop on Sandy's colorful wedding and her Christmas ornament bouquet.

The offbeat bride: Sandy - high school secretary/craft maniac

Her offbeat partner: Josh - middle school social studies teacher/musician

Location & date of wedding: 3/15/08 at Butler's Courtyard in League City, TX

What made our wedding offbeat: We wanted the wedding to reflect us as a couple and be memorable, but we also didn't want to alienate any family members or make them feel uncomfortable along the way. We wanted to express ourselves while still making everyone feel welcome. We chose a rather traditional venue, but it still had enough character and history (we both majored in history) to make us fall in love with it. Also, the owners seemed to really be on board with any and all ideas we had, so that made it excellent.

Continue reading "Sandy's colorful, crafty, hip-but-won't-scare-grandma wedding" →