The offbeat bride: Obsidian, Secretary
Her offbeat partner: Wayne, Warehouse

Location & date of wedding: Royal Canadian Legion Hall Maple Leaf Branch No. 66 on October 14th, 2006 in Toronto, Ontario

What made our wedding offbeat: After knowing my hubby for about 13 years we finally up and decided to get hitched. So we got engaged with a 4 carat garnet ring that I chose, then got down the nitty gritty and planned a wedding for 10 months in the future.

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You may remember when we featured Kerosene Deluxe’s amazing gothabilly hair a few months back — now here’s the full story!

The offbeat bride: Shanah (aka Miss Kerosene Deluxe), Plus-sized pin up model/Makeup artist/Part-time beauty shop manager

Her offbeat partner: Jerry, Chef

Location & date of wedding: The Courthouse/Beni Hana restaurant and Thomson House, Montreal, Quebec - August 9th, 2008

What made our wedding offbeat: Jerry and I are an offbeat couple, so it was no suprise to those who know us that our wedding would be an ‘unusual affair’. We just took everything we love and mixed it all together.

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We all know I love Wai Ching wedding dresses — but I’ve never seen an entire wedding party decked out in Wai Ching. It’s hot!

Even the groomsgirl got her own coordinated dress:

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The offbeat bride: Belinda, Makeup Artist & Singer

Her offbeat partner: Stu, Manager & Singer

Location & date of wedding: Fitzroy Gardens Melbourne, Australia - April 19th, 2008

What made our wedding offbeat: Hot pink was a central color palette… my bridesmaids wore black with hot pink heels and my flowers were hot pink and blood red, fixed together with a thick black and white striped ribbon. The contrasting colours looked awesome! We also had bright orange and gold Chevy Impalas, complete with hydraulics!

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I am an Auckland, New Zealand OBB and am thinking of asking my three brideswomen to just pick a dress they like (maybe within a colour scheme…?) I don’t think they have to be matching because they are all uniquely beautiful and hopefully will feel more comfortable in something that they have picked out themselves. Have you got any pics of non-matching brideswomens’ dresses? -Sabrina

This is actually a very popular choice among offbeat brides — encouraging bridesmaids to wear something that generally coordinates, but isn’t matchy-matchy. I’ve heard stories of some bridesmaids being uncomfortable with the idea (I guess freedom can be overwhelming?), but giving your brides dress liberation can be a great way to make sure that your ladies enjoy maximum awesomeness on your wedding day.

As for pictures — damn right I’ve got some!

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Typically, “wedding porn” is just a figurative term … but I pretty much want to have sex with Meaghan’s ENTIRE WEDDING PARTY. The bridesmaids in their red dresses! The groomsmen in their vests and inked forearms! The groomsgirls in their adorable shirts! Only you Seattleites will get the neighborhood reference, but this may be the most perfectly Georgetown wedding I’ve ever seen.

Lots more hawtness over here.

I recently received some questions from a journalist for an article she’s writing about bridesmaids. I thought I’d include my answers here.

What do you think are some of the (perceived or actual) down sides of being a bridesmaid, and how can a forward-thinking bride avoid putting her maids through those experiences?

In the process of researching my book, I spoke to one former bridesmaid who’d been chastised by the bride for getting her shoulder-length hair cut into a bob before the wedding. The bride fuh-REAKED out, because now this one bridesmaid wouldn’t be able to have the pre-set bridemaid updo.

Brides and bridesmaids need to be well matched! If pre-ordained matching up-dos are important to you, then pick bridesmaids who are into meticulous aesthetics.

While this story is pretty fucked up, the thing it makes the most clear to me is that brides and bridesmaids need to be well matched! If, as a bride, things like pre-ordained matching up-dos are super insanely important to you, then pick bridesmaids who are into meticulous aesthetics.

I think it’s really important to have a discussion up-front about what the expectations are. Just ask the bride straight out what she wants and expects from you. If it doesn’t sound like your cup of tea, tell her you love her and would love to help with the wedding in some other way, but that you’re just not in the right headspace to be the bridesmaid she needs. No one’s to blame — it’s no one’s fault. You’re better off having this discussion be a little awkward than dealing with months (or years!) of stress around a wedding you don’t want to be in.

What are some of the things that make a bridesmaid’s experience a positive one?

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I’ve told my bridesmaids that they can wear any black dress of their choosing. Since I’m not requiring them to buy an actual bridesmaid’s dress (ick), should I offer to pay a sort of stipend for a new dress that they will probably buy for the wedding anyway? Or are they on their own if they choose to buy a new dress? — Sarah, aka Lady Vengeance of the Garden State Rollergirls

Sarah first off: yay for letting your bridesmaids pick their own dresses. Second off, yay for making it something easy and pragmatic like a black dress, something most of us already own and have plenty of opportunities to wear. Third off: yay for being considerate of your ladies’ financial concerns. Three yays for you, bad ass!

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