I am an Auckland, New Zealand OBB and am thinking of asking my three brideswomen to just pick a dress they like (maybe within a colour scheme…?) I don’t think they have to be matching because they are all uniquely beautiful and hopefully will feel more comfortable in something that they have picked out themselves. Have you got any pics of non-matching brideswomens’ dresses? -Sabrina

This is actually a very popular choice among offbeat brides — encouraging bridesmaids to wear something that generally coordinates, but isn’t matchy-matchy. I’ve heard stories of some bridesmaids being uncomfortable with the idea (I guess freedom can be overwhelming?), but giving your brides dress liberation can be a great way to make sure that your ladies enjoy maximum awesomeness on your wedding day.

As for pictures — damn right I’ve got some!

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I’ve told my bridesmaids that they can wear any black dress of their choosing. Since I’m not requiring them to buy an actual bridesmaid’s dress (ick), should I offer to pay a sort of stipend for a new dress that they will probably buy for the wedding anyway? Or are they on their own if they choose to buy a new dress? — Sarah, aka Lady Vengeance of the Garden State Rollergirls

Sarah first off: yay for letting your bridesmaids pick their own dresses. Second off, yay for making it something easy and pragmatic like a black dress, something most of us already own and have plenty of opportunities to wear. Third off: yay for being considerate of your ladies’ financial concerns. Three yays for you, bad ass!

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