First, grab your copy of the book that started it all
If you like offbeatbride.com then of course you need a copy of Offbeat Bride: Taffeta-Free Alternatives for Independent Brides! And no, you shouldn't just read the website — here are 12 reasons why you need the book.
The book can be purchased on the Intarwebs from Amazon.com, Powell's Books, or Barnes & Noble. If you're in Canada, you can also buy it from Chapters.
If you'd rather buy indie (yes, please do!), ask for it at your local independent bookseller. If they don't have it, they can order it for you. You can also find or order the book at all chain bookstores in the US and Canada.
Offbeat Bride reading list
Of course there are lots of other wedding books out there! Below are a few favorites, recommended and reviewed by Offbeat Bride readers … and if YOU have favorite non-traditional wedding book that's not mentioned here, lemme know!
The DIY Bride: 40 Fun Projects for Your Ultimate One-of-a-Kind Wedding
by Khris Cochran
I interviewed the author of this book last year, and she's got some wonderful sane perspectives on DIY-ing your wedding without driving yourself crazy.
OBB reader Kathleen: An absolute must have for any diy girl! Invites, decor, jewelery, etc.
by Khris Cochran
I interviewed the author of this book last year, and she's got some wonderful sane perspectives on DIY-ing your wedding without driving yourself crazy.
OBB reader Kathleen: An absolute must have for any diy girl! Invites, decor, jewelery, etc.
The DIY Wedding: Celebrate Your Day Your Way
by Kelly Bare
OBB reader Emily says: This was one of the first wedding books I picked up that made me feel excited instead of overwhelmed.
OBB reader Isla: The book has chapters on subjects such as Attire, Invitations, Photos & Video, Food & Drink, Flowers, Favors, Rings, The Ceremony, The Reception and Craftily Ever After. It has details of web resources for each chapter at the back and has'"we did' sections in the chapters where people have shared their experiences.
by Kelly Bare
OBB reader Emily says: This was one of the first wedding books I picked up that made me feel excited instead of overwhelmed.OBB reader Isla: The book has chapters on subjects such as Attire, Invitations, Photos & Video, Food & Drink, Flowers, Favors, Rings, The Ceremony, The Reception and Craftily Ever After. It has details of web resources for each chapter at the back and has'"we did' sections in the chapters where people have shared their experiences.
Handfasting and Wedding Rituals: Welcoming Hera's Blessing
by Raven Kaldera, Tannin Schwartzstein
OBB reader ShoelaceGirl: Neither of us are Pagan, but I found a lot of non-vomit-inducing wording that I fell in love with.
OBB reader Stephanie For all you witchy brides, this has great ideas whether you're keeping it on the down-low or having a formal handfasting. There's an entire section on interfaith rituals, with everything from the usual suspects to Hinduism, Muslim, and Buddhist cross-overs. Also has nods toward same sex handfastings, transexual handfastings, and poly handfastings. There's even a ritual in there specifically geared toward the goth at heart.
by Raven Kaldera, Tannin Schwartzstein
OBB reader ShoelaceGirl: Neither of us are Pagan, but I found a lot of non-vomit-inducing wording that I fell in love with. OBB reader Stephanie For all you witchy brides, this has great ideas whether you're keeping it on the down-low or having a formal handfasting. There's an entire section on interfaith rituals, with everything from the usual suspects to Hinduism, Muslim, and Buddhist cross-overs. Also has nods toward same sex handfastings, transexual handfastings, and poly handfastings. There's even a ritual in there specifically geared toward the goth at heart.
The Best of Martha Stewart Living : Weddings
by Martha Stewart Living Magazine
Nobody said Martha was Offbeat, but as OBB reader Kathleen points out: Martha has some amazing wedding porn. A lot of it is pretty extreme ($$-wise) but definitely great for inspiration.
by Martha Stewart Living Magazine
Nobody said Martha was Offbeat, but as OBB reader Kathleen points out: Martha has some amazing wedding porn. A lot of it is pretty extreme ($$-wise) but definitely great for inspiration.
Miss Manners on Weddings
by Judith Martin
OBB reader Heather: I have never been so amused to hear someone politely bash stupid ideas. Granted, she's a bit conservative (apparently, you CAN'T have your bridesmaids wear black), but her advice is usually right on the money - use your heart and your head. You might even find that you're more traditional than you first thought. Old world traditional (aka, pre-wedding industry), but applicable nonetheless.
OBB reader Kit: Miss Manners kicks ass. She's a bit old-fashioned for me, but her actual etiquette is so quietly judgmental of people who hurt others' feelings, as opposed to giving a crap who gets a corsage (I think she's from too long ago for that particular tradition, lucky her).
by Judith Martin
OBB reader Heather: I have never been so amused to hear someone politely bash stupid ideas. Granted, she's a bit conservative (apparently, you CAN'T have your bridesmaids wear black), but her advice is usually right on the money - use your heart and your head. You might even find that you're more traditional than you first thought. Old world traditional (aka, pre-wedding industry), but applicable nonetheless.
OBB reader Kit: Miss Manners kicks ass. She's a bit old-fashioned for me, but her actual etiquette is so quietly judgmental of people who hurt others' feelings, as opposed to giving a crap who gets a corsage (I think she's from too long ago for that particular tradition, lucky her).
Bridal Bargains, 8th Edition: Secrets to throwing a fantastic wedding on a realistic budget
by Denise Fields
OBB reader Katie: This book is pretty good at recommending alternative routes to go if you're looking for deals (though I think a lot of their advice is now widely known and in some cases not very helpful) and also good at scaring the bejeezus out of me in terms of all the ways a vendor can screw you over.
I think it's more helpful on that last part than the actual finding bargains part. It definitely takes the approach of "these people are out there to make money off you" rather than "you NEED to have this at your wedding".
They also have good questions to ask each vendor to make sure that you're not getting screwed out of something (and sometimes the questions are stuff I wouldn't think of otherwise).
by Denise Fields
OBB reader Katie: This book is pretty good at recommending alternative routes to go if you're looking for deals (though I think a lot of their advice is now widely known and in some cases not very helpful) and also good at scaring the bejeezus out of me in terms of all the ways a vendor can screw you over. I think it's more helpful on that last part than the actual finding bargains part. It definitely takes the approach of "these people are out there to make money off you" rather than "you NEED to have this at your wedding".
They also have good questions to ask each vendor to make sure that you're not getting screwed out of something (and sometimes the questions are stuff I wouldn't think of otherwise).
Wedding Goddess: A Divine Guide to Transforming Wedding Stress into Wedding Bliss
by Laurie Sue Brockway
OBB reader Shoelacegirl: Loved this one! It helps you focus on your emotions and wellbeing as well as planning.
by Laurie Sue Brockway
OBB reader Shoelacegirl: Loved this one! It helps you focus on your emotions and wellbeing as well as planning.
Altared: Bridezillas, Bewilderment, Big Love, Breakups, and What Women Really Think About Contemporary Weddings
by Colleen Curran
OBB reader Christina: Essays written by women about weddings, but not the sappy, lovey, dovey kind of stuff. Stories about divorced parents or parents passing away before a wedding, never enough money and too much stress, tuestioning motives for marriage, and wanting the marriage but not the wedding.
by Colleen Curran
OBB reader Christina: Essays written by women about weddings, but not the sappy, lovey, dovey kind of stuff. Stories about divorced parents or parents passing away before a wedding, never enough money and too much stress, tuestioning motives for marriage, and wanting the marriage but not the wedding.
Something New: Wedding Etiquette for Rule Breakers, Traditionalists, and Everyone in Between
by Elise Mac Adam
OBB reader Cody: This is the etiquette book from Elise Mac Adams of Indiebride. I thought it was much more realistic than most wedding etiquette guides I've looked at."
by Elise Mac Adam
OBB reader Cody: This is the etiquette book from Elise Mac Adams of Indiebride. I thought it was much more realistic than most wedding etiquette guides I've looked at."
One Perfect Day: The Selling of the American Wedding
by Rebecca Mead
OBB reader Christina: This book is sort of an investigative report of the wedding industry. The author quotes #s and such but not to such a heavy degree that it gets boring. She goes to weddings in Vegas, dress factories in China, events hosted by Bride magazine, a wedding planner recruitment seminar and much more.
I was interested in how the author examined what America thinks is traditional for a wedding, may not be truly traditional after all. Some of the tone she uses in the book annoyed me some. But overall it is a good, informative and interesting read.
by Rebecca Mead
OBB reader Christina: This book is sort of an investigative report of the wedding industry. The author quotes #s and such but not to such a heavy degree that it gets boring. She goes to weddings in Vegas, dress factories in China, events hosted by Bride magazine, a wedding planner recruitment seminar and much more.I was interested in how the author examined what America thinks is traditional for a wedding, may not be truly traditional after all. Some of the tone she uses in the book annoyed me some. But overall it is a good, informative and interesting read.
Prenups for Lovers: A Romantic Guide to Prenuptial Agreements
by Arlene Dubin
OBB reader Erin: I've known for a long time that I was going to have a pre-nup and FH was 100% agreeable, although he hadn't given it much thought before. But, if I hadn't been sure, I think this book would have convinced me. It talked about lots of reasons you might not think of to get one (do you stand to inherit someday?) and had examples of what to include. From other reviews raving about it I'd hoped for a slightly more hip style of writing, but it was still well done."
by Arlene Dubin
OBB reader Erin: I've known for a long time that I was going to have a pre-nup and FH was 100% agreeable, although he hadn't given it much thought before. But, if I hadn't been sure, I think this book would have convinced me. It talked about lots of reasons you might not think of to get one (do you stand to inherit someday?) and had examples of what to include. From other reviews raving about it I'd hoped for a slightly more hip style of writing, but it was still well done."
The Conscious Bride: Women Unveil Their True Feelings About Getting Hitched (Women Talk About)
by Sheryl Paul
OBB reader Alexela: Author Sheryl Paul talks about the way that brides misplace their emotions; the grief, fear and loneliness involved this crazy life / identity transition.
How are your relationships with your parents and girlfriends changing? How do you feel about it? Is anyone else experiencing grief, fear, loneliness? I don't mean that "having doubts." I just mean, having scary/crazy feelings that manifest as obsessive planning/striving for perfection.
I strongly recommend this book. It is helping me understand my innersides.
by Sheryl Paul
OBB reader Alexela: Author Sheryl Paul talks about the way that brides misplace their emotions; the grief, fear and loneliness involved this crazy life / identity transition. How are your relationships with your parents and girlfriends changing? How do you feel about it? Is anyone else experiencing grief, fear, loneliness? I don't mean that "having doubts." I just mean, having scary/crazy feelings that manifest as obsessive planning/striving for perfection.
I strongly recommend this book. It is helping me understand my innersides.
Financially Ever After: The Couples' Guide to Managing Money
by Jeff D. Opdyke
OBB reader Erin: Until recently, the author wrote the "Love and Money" column for the Wall Street Journal, which I really enjoyed reading. It had some good questions to ask each other before getting married, talked about joint vs. individual accounts, and had several budget spreadsheets that were VERY thorough.
I'd highly recommend it for couples that haven't been together very long or haven't discussed money matters.
by Jeff D. Opdyke
OBB reader Erin: Until recently, the author wrote the "Love and Money" column for the Wall Street Journal, which I really enjoyed reading. It had some good questions to ask each other before getting married, talked about joint vs. individual accounts, and had several budget spreadsheets that were VERY thorough.I'd highly recommend it for couples that haven't been together very long or haven't discussed money matters.
Eco-Chic Weddings: Simple Tips to Plan an Earth-Friendly, Socially Responsible, Affordable Green Wedding
by Emily Elizabeth Anderson
OBB reader Rachel: I found it to be a useful book for those looking to 'green-up' their weddings.
by Emily Elizabeth Anderson
OBB reader Rachel: I found it to be a useful book for those looking to 'green-up' their weddings.
The Wedding Ceremony Planner: The Essential Guide to the Most Important Part of Your Wedding Day
by Judith Johnson
OBB reader Stephanie: If you're writing your own ceremony, combining faiths, or just not sure of how a ceremony is supposed to read, this is a must read. Seriously, it's brilliant. Very open-minded, TONS of suggested texts, you can literally pick and choose your entire ceremony just from this book if you want to.
by Judith Johnson
OBB reader Stephanie: If you're writing your own ceremony, combining faiths, or just not sure of how a ceremony is supposed to read, this is a must read. Seriously, it's brilliant. Very open-minded, TONS of suggested texts, you can literally pick and choose your entire ceremony just from this book if you want to.
If the Buddha Married: Creating Enduring Relationships on a Spiritual Path
by Charlotte Kasl
OBB reader Lucia: This book isn't actually much about Buddhism, but it's a refreshing and reassuring (and easy) read.
by Charlotte Kasl
OBB reader Lucia: This book isn't actually much about Buddhism, but it's a refreshing and reassuring (and easy) read.
How to Have the Wedding You Want (Not the One Everybody Else Wants You to Have)
by Danielle Claro
OBB reader Alexis: This book feels like a shrink in your pocket. There were some parts on how and when to pick your battles, compromise, or tell everyone how to fuck off...nicely. I really enjoyed the book.
Danielle interviewed brides, grooms, professionals (and even some of her own advice) to get their input so that you can take their knowledge and make the day completely yours without feeling guilty about it. She takes offbeat and traditional brides into consideration, also, and respects that everyone has a different (and perfectly acceptable!!!) view of their wedding, no matter how weird.
(This book is out of print, but you can find it used on Amazon.)
by Danielle Claro
OBB reader Alexis: This book feels like a shrink in your pocket. There were some parts on how and when to pick your battles, compromise, or tell everyone how to fuck off...nicely. I really enjoyed the book.
Danielle interviewed brides, grooms, professionals (and even some of her own advice) to get their input so that you can take their knowledge and make the day completely yours without feeling guilty about it. She takes offbeat and traditional brides into consideration, also, and respects that everyone has a different (and perfectly acceptable!!!) view of their wedding, no matter how weird.
(This book is out of print, but you can find it used on Amazon.)
iDo: Planning Your Wedding with Nothing But 'Net
by Christa Terry
OBB reader Sara: This book was printed in 2008 so it's pretty current. I've found some of the resources that Christa lists invaluable in planning, shopping, etc. her attitude is very OBB and realistic and she's completely honest about the usefulness of each site she mentions. A girl could plan her whole wedding just referring to THIS book and OBB.
by Christa Terry
OBB reader Sara: This book was printed in 2008 so it's pretty current. I've found some of the resources that Christa lists invaluable in planning, shopping, etc. her attitude is very OBB and realistic and she's completely honest about the usefulness of each site she mentions. A girl could plan her whole wedding just referring to THIS book and OBB.
Wedding Chic: The Savvy Bride's Guide to Getting More While Spending Less
by Nina Willdorf
OBB reader Sara: This was published in 2004/05 so the prices are out-of-date but the advice and knowledge is extremely helpful. Nina doesn't just tell you how to cut things out of your wedding to save money but how to realistically cut the cost of things you still want to have in your wedding. Another invaluable book for brides.
by Nina Willdorf
OBB reader Sara: This was published in 2004/05 so the prices are out-of-date but the advice and knowledge is extremely helpful. Nina doesn't just tell you how to cut things out of your wedding to save money but how to realistically cut the cost of things you still want to have in your wedding. Another invaluable book for brides.
The New Jewish Wedding, Revised
by Anita Diamant
OBB reader/A Practical Wedding blogger Meg: Feminist, fabby, best egalitarian queer friendly Jewish wedding book on the market.
by Anita Diamant
OBB reader/A Practical Wedding blogger Meg: Feminist, fabby, best egalitarian queer friendly Jewish wedding book on the market.
The The Green Bride Guide: How to Create an Earth-Friendly Wedding on Any Budget
by Kate Harrison
OBB reader Ellen: This was a great read for me as I was planning my wedding. Great tips (for ANY budget) on how to have a ecologically conscious wedding.
by Kate Harrison
OBB reader Ellen: This was a great read for me as I was planning my wedding. Great tips (for ANY budget) on how to have a ecologically conscious wedding.
I Do but I Don’t: Walking Down the Aisle without Losing Your Mind
by Kamy Wicoff
OBB reader Hibryd: Not exactly a how-to-guide but it covered the Wedding Industrial Complex and even some of the thornier issues of marriage and proposal in a world where feminism and tradition collide.
by Kamy Wicoff
OBB reader Hibryd: Not exactly a how-to-guide but it covered the Wedding Industrial Complex and even some of the thornier issues of marriage and proposal in a world where feminism and tradition collide.
Buy the "Altar your thinking" t-shirt
Perfect to wear to meetings with those dubious vendors or disagreeable family members, the ALTAR YOUR THINKING t-shirt encourages the rest of the world to consider a little offbeat thinking.
There are only about 10 shirts left total, and once they're gone … THAT'S IT. I will not be stocking shirts any more. 
Black tshirt with white print
Sizes: In women's M (one left!); and men's S, M, L, XL.
SOLD OUT: WOMEN'S SMALL & LARGE; MEN'S LARGE.
About the women's tees:
There's exactly one Women's shirt left in stock, and it's a medium!
- Shorter cap sleeve tee with binding at neck and hemmed sleeve.
- Ultra-soft, superfine fabric.
- Runs small, but stretches.
About the men's/plus-size tees:
- Double-stitched bottom hem with taped neck and baby rib cotton stretchable collar.
- Untaped shoulder seams.
- Luxurious fabric.
- Fitted cut.
Black shirt price: $20
Gray tshirt with lilac trim
Sizes: In women's Medium
There's exactly one shirt left in stock, and it's a medium!
About the shirt:
- Crewneck tee with contrasting double-layer illusion at neck, cuffs and bottom opening.
- Raw-edge finishing.
- Fitted cut.
- Runs a full size small!
Gray shirt price: $20
