While my sweetie and I DO want to exchange rings, we DON’T want to spend a lot of money on them, and we have no interest in traditional, mainstream wedding rings. We want something simple, different, and not made out of gold. We live in a town that doesn’t have anything like that, so online is our best bet. But once we start looking around for wedding bands, all we find are expensive, boring, overly-decadent gold and diamond style rings… There’s just too much online to know where to start! -Sara

I applaud your decision to go the non-diamond, inexpensive route for your wedding rings. Diamonds are grossly overpriced, and of course there’s that whole blood diamond thing, so you’re so much better off going for either a different stone or no stone at all.

First things first: are you SURE there aren’t any custom jewelry makers in your neck of the woods? There’s nothing more awesome than designing your own bands, and if you find a good jewelry maker they can usually work within your budget. Plus, it’s cool to support a local artisan.

Here’s a first tip: Don’t look for “wedding rings” — they always cost more!

That said, if there really aren’t any around, you’re right: there are TONS of online options. Here’s a first tip: Don’t look for “wedding rings” — they always cost more! There’s this strange phenomenon of somehow if it has to do with a wedding it costs twice as much. Seriously. This isn’t just for rings, it’s for dresses, flowers, suits, chair rentals, everything. It’s a total racket. So when shopping online for rings, don’t search for “wedding bands.” Just look for rings that you like.

That said, here are a few links to get you started:

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Fiori Floral Designs, Seattle WA
“Our designers’ input can be as small as creating the perfect bouquet and boutonniere for you. We also offer full consultation-to-installation services, rental of containers and coordination of linen and chair rentals to provide a cohesive, unified look.”

Here’s a testimonial from a happy offbeat bride Dana:

Fiori supplied the flowers for my wedding last year and they were EFFING SPECTACULAR!!!! They were also super wonderful to work with. Highest recommendations if you need flowers that are unique and dazzling.

How unique and dazzling you ask? Check Fiori Floral Design’s site for more information.

The offbeat bride: Brittany Wager, Audio Engineer (and Offbeat Bride lab rat!)

My offbeat groom: Steve Wager, Web Consultant

Location & date of wedding: August 2002 at the Buffalo Gap Camp in Capon Bridge, West Virginia — the same place where we met at the All Good Music Festival in 2000.

What made our wedding offbeat: Since we met at a music festival, we wanted to recreate that atmosphere. Once we booked the location everything else sort of fell in to place. We had the campground from Friday morning to Sunday afternoon, so we invited everyone to join us for the whole weekend — not just the day of the wedding. We had a bonfire and jam on Friday night, a cookout and open mic at the lake on Saturday afternoon, and one of our favorite bands played three sets after the wedding. Getting everyone together so far ahead of the actual ceremony was wonderful. They all knew each other very well before the “main event” and it helped to being together our different groups of friends and family into one community.

I put a lot of focus into the music and making sure that everyone would be comfortable and have a good time. I didn’t spend too much time on things like linens, centerpieces, food, etc. In the end people don’t tend to remember those things anyway.

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When researching Offbeat Bride, without a doubt the hottest topic among my labs rats was women changing their last names. One increasingly popular method of dealing with this feminist minefield is both the bride and the groom assuming a new last name. Seems to solve all the problems, right?

Well, turns out that in many states it’s significantly harder for husbands to change their last names. As in, hundreds of dollars harder. And now, one brave offbeat groom has teamed up with The American Civil Liberties Union of Southern California (ACLU/SC) to sue the state over a law that makes it easy-peasy for women to assume their husbands’ last names — but a pain in the ass for grooms to change their last names. Check it out:

As Michael Buday saw it, the road to matrimonial bliss was a nontraditional one that included taking on his wife’s last name, reports the Feminist Daily News Wire. Problem is, according to a lawsuit filed on his behalf by the American Civil Liberties Union, in California men are required to pay upward of $300, file a court petition and advertise their name change for a month in the local newspaper; a woman, in contrast, can change her name through marriage by simply paying a $50 to $80 filing fee. Buday also says he was ridiculed when he tried to legally take his wife’s last name at the Department of Motor Vehicles. Read more.

The offbeat bride: Jen Moon, Project Manager (and Offbeat Bride lab rat!)

My offbeat groom: Scott O. Moore, Program Manager

Location & date of wedding: Capitol Hill Arts Center Showroom, Seattle, WA

What made our wedding offbeat: We wrote and produced Wedding! The Musical and had our friends star in it with us. Not only was there popcorn and commemorative posters sold pre-show along with a mime, during the “show” there was music, dancing, lip synching, a trapeze swing, skits to tell the story of our relationship, and eventually a ceremony complete with a ringleader, fire, and uh, missing rings. We also spent 3 months learning a choreographed swing dance and pretended to get in a huge fight in front of the 225 guests before sailing into said dance.

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Offbeat Bride is taking Central Oregon media by storm! The Eugene Weekly published a great article about the book today, which emphasizes my obsession with all things geeky and web-interactive:

The book itself is not glossy, but Stallings’ interactive website (www.offbeatbride.com) and her Flickr group (www.flickr.com/groups/offbeatbride/), where other “offbeat” brides can upload photos, take advantage of the whole Web 2.0 thing.

Read the whole piece!

The article also includes this quote:

“Entering into this event-planning process makes people who are really pretty traditional feel like complete freaks,” [Stallings] says.”

Dude, this is a key surprise for me when researching the book. Brides planning weddings that to my eye seems pretty straight-forward and traditional still found themselves battling over even the tiniest deviations from the norm. I’m reminded of one bride who was having a Catholic wedding, but wanted to have “Moon River” as her processional music. MOON RIVER, people. This is not a wild tune. But her idea was met with keen resistance because it wasn’t “Pachelbel’s Canon.” Pretty remarkable.

(Oh and I love that the Eugene Weekly included a picture of Lisa Marie Grillos, one of my bridal lab rats who I interviewed for the book!)