Surviving as offbeat in mainstream online communities

Is it just me, or is it difficult being an Offbeat Bride on more traditional websites? While I love to talk about planning weddings, why are the communities on these websites as a whole so judgmental? Is it just me that's met with this…hostility, if I even dare to ask about something that seems too offbeat, taboo, and "rude?" We're just surviving as offbeat in mainstream online communities…

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Bridal "best selves": when is too far?

As with many Offbeat Bride readers, this blog was a welcome antidote to the bridal mags and blogs that represent all brides as being white, thin, tanned, and perfect. Not that there's anything wrong with those things, but when you don't fit into that round hole, the bridal industry can make you feel a bit like Square Peggy. Aiming for perfection in any aspect of a wedding, whether it's your letter-pressed invites or sun-dappled forest grove location, is asking for tears before bedtime.

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Skeptic turned bride: The 5 feminist wedding choices I made

Like many feminists, I have always regarded the institution of marriage with some skepticism. While at one point in my life I thought I would never get married, I changed my mind when I met my husband, Chuck. Being with him made me feel like I wanted to experience everything life had to offer, including marriage and whatever that entailed. I wanted to celebrate our love and our life together with the people we care about the most and honor our commitment to each other.

But marriage will always be a tradition borne out of the patriarchy. So there I was on our wedding day, a feminist dressed in ivory, clutching my father's arm while he walked me down the aisle.

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Why read wedding blogs?

Why are you here right now? If the data I have is accurate, chances are pretty good that you're looking for wedding ideas (you KNOW we have a million for you to steal) or trying to get inspired. Neither of these are especially surprising, right? I see the same cycle happen every year, with a wave of freshly engaged folks flooding in looking for ideas and inspiration… and then at a certain point being like "Oh my god, I'm overwhelmed with ideas! I have too much inspiration! I need to stop looking at wedding porn and start, like, actually getting some shit done."

But let's talk over all the other reasons you might be reading…