So the homophobic-tendency people are off the list, and I can live with that — but what if this happens anyway, because I missed someone on the list with views I didn't know about? Has anyone else ever had a problem like this happen to them? How did you handle it? Do you have family that is prejudiced, and how did you handle knowing about their issues, and reconciling that with your wedding guests?
This is Offbeat Bride's archive of Friends & Family Advice posts.
We've got it all for you: compromising on guestlist issues, managing family expectations, negotiating wedding party dramas, rising to bridesmaid challenges, and OH so much more.
Our wedsite FAQ will be how 80% of my (very Catholic) family will have the "Surprise! I've converted to a different religion!" news broken to them, so it's important. So I figured I'd share the wording we used, in case someone was in a similar situation and wanted some wording ideas…
I know this is a space for Offbeat Brides, and not so long ago I was an one, but is there any advice to be had for those of us who are offbeat bridesmaids for more traditional brides? When my most recent engaged friend asked me to be a part of her day as a bridesmaid I was thrilled! But now… some things are making my uncomfortable. How do I explain to my bride that I want to be a part of her day, but don't want to compromise myself in the process?
I booked the reception venue, which we are only allowed to use after 6pm, way before booking the church. I did not know then that the church would only do a wedding at 1pm. So, assuming the ceremony lasts an hour, we have four hours to kill between the ceremony and the reception. What should we do with that time?
The fella and I got engaged right before we traveled home to see our families for a vacation. We both have incredibly kind, welcoming families, so I was prepared for the outpouring of joy, and I was prepared to answer the inevitable when-where-who questions, too. But then, the suggestions started rolling in… At the same time, I felt like my ideas were being dismissed out-of-hand. On our last day of our vacation, I had a minor meltdown in the car. I didn't know how to respond to the onslaught of suggestions we had received. Until I had a stroke of genius…
How do you dealing with the fact that, technology-wise, you are living in the 21st century, but your parents and their friends are not? I'm finding I'm having wedding planning complications with our evites, the online-only registries, and the concept of photo sharing.
I've come to hate the question: "How's the wedding planning going?" Because it's usually followed by someone totally shooting down my last planning decision. But here's the deal: Wedding planning is stressful enough as it is. And if I listened to and implemented everyone else's advice, then I would be planning their wedding and not my fiancé's and mine.
My future mother-in-law has decided that she is throwing me a bridal shower. My wording there is intentional — she did not ask if I wanted one, she did not ask if my bridespeeps were throwing me one (they're not, because they know I don't want one), she Just Decided.
For many reasons, I've tried to be polite and just say "no thanks," but she's insisting.
I have no interest in this event, although I realize that it is very nice of her to offer to throw me one. How do I get out of this?
There are a million reasons why someone offering to help out at your wedding will actually cause more hindrance than help. Distance, time, ability… whatever. These people are offering their help because they care about you and want your day to be as awesome as possible. So what's the best way to accommodate these helpers without pulling your hair out?
I had this whole "being a good wedding guest" thing down. Now that my own wedding has passed, I realized that there were some wedding guest mistakes I was making, despite my best intentions. These are the things I've learned about being a good wedding guest that I never would have realized until having my own wedding…