A nice 'n' sane bridesmaids contract

January 3 | Guest post by Monicawesome

You may recall An Offbeat Bride's vows to herself. The author, Monicawesome, is back with a great bridesmaid's contract that isn't nuts.

three slurpees, alike in sugary dignity
Photography by Aaron Young

I've read a lot of bridal party kvetching, from both the bride and bridesmaid sides, but the one that topped the cake for me was when a friend of mine's bride-to-be sent out CONTRACTS for her ladies to sign, a la this masterpiece. I always thought the one in the link was a joke, but the friend's now-wife was dead serious about hers.

So I decided to minimize any misunderstandings about my expectations for my bridesmaids before they begin. In that spirit, I present my very own Bridesmaid Contract!

______ I will listen to Monica's babbling, and let her know she's only slightly crazy.

______ I will have fun while planning with Monica.

______ I will look however I want, because Monica doesn't care.

______ I swear to "be there" for the bride just like I always am, because she is my friend.

______ I will NOT let Monica's wedding detract from other parts of my life.

______ I will not forget that while I am Monica's friend, she is MY friend as well, and is there if I need her

______ I will eat, drink, and be merry whenever possible.

______ I will engage in much laughter and *inappropriate hugging*

______ I will tease Nick whenever possible.

______ I will tease Monica whenever possible.

______ I will not feel the need to spend a ton of money on a dress/shoes/jewelry/manicure/WHATEVER.

______ I will have an amazing time!

I do hereby swear that I will adhere to all of the above and other understood bridesmaid duties for the wedding on October 28, 2012

X_________________________
(sign, print and date)

I'm going to send this out in a card to each of my friends when I ask them to be bridesmaids.

You know we love your comments, but please be conscious about NOT using this as a space to complain about less-than-satisfactory bridesmaids. We're not about bitching, we're about supporting!

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  1. LOL – that's fantastic! Too bad we're already hitched, 'cause I would *so* steal it to give to my Maids of Awesome! I especially like the "I will not feel the need to spend a ton of money … "; far better to have a good time than an outrageously expensive ensemble. 😉

    2 agree
  2. Bookmarked! A great idea in and of itself. The "original" contract is ::ahem:: a bit intense – no offense of course to any brides out there. I prefer this version much more!

    4 agree
  3. Love it, might have to steal! I asked my girls back in the summer, and with the holidays and another family members wedding the past few months, our wedding has been on the back burner. But now that we can concentrate on ours, I might have to send this out as a "reminder" of all the fun that is to be had!! 🙂

  4. That is awesome. The other one was just scary. I hadn't seen anything like it before. ick.

    3 agree
  5. Aw, this makes me wish I had a bunch of ladies to send this to! My sister is definitely gonna be up there with me but other than her it's guys I get along with .. maybe i'll have some dudes of awesome instead of brides maids 🙂

    2 agree
  6. I like the first comment where she says MAIDS OF AWESOME! Thats so true. The ladies and gents (mixed gender bridal party on my side) …are the most awesome people ever.

    I think this contract is a great way to break the ice and keep everyone (including me) in check.

    This is my second wedding and the first time we were fairly traditional but I let my girls wear whatever they wanted and they sure did and I was so happy with that. I also did not have a dress code for my guests. They know what to wear and what looks good on them…what they wear is not my decision to make in this group of family and friends.

    I am super excited to come up with a witty and cool contract for my maids of awesome!

    Thanks for sharing ^_^

  7. I'm totally stealing this. Sure, I only have two bridesmaids, but it's my oldest friend and my sister. The friend is getting married herself, and the sister is in the first throws of pre-med. I REALLY don't want them stressing about my wedding, just enjoy, party, and hold my flowers when I need a free hand, thanks.

  8. Currently editing this to suit my needs. The most major revision is as follows:
    "I will try not to look sexier than Stephanie on her wedding day, but sometimes I just can’t help it."

    8 agree
  9. Ooh! IDEA! You could adapt this to a guest contract so easily and let people know exactly what to expect at your wedding, while having a cute and funny invitation. I've been struggling with trying to come up with an invitation I like, and this might just be perfect.

    5 agree
  10. I adore this post. It makes me laugh that people seem to think I'm strange for NOT making ridiculous demands on my bridesmaids! I'm going to find a fun way to use this 🙂

  11. I love this! I love my "future bridesmaids" & would hope they have a great time with me planning & being in our wedding. I think this is a unique and awesome way to start it off in a fun way!!

  12. I sent a contract to my girls. My cousin opened hers in front of someone who made comments that I must have been a bridezilla to send a contract. The only thing is my contract made me friends promise to have fun, hit me upside the head if I became crazy and could only talk about the wedding. I asked my girls to let me know if they wanted to be more/less involved, if they couldn’t be in the wedding for whatever reason or if the monetary aspect became too much. You know what, it has worked. One of my best friends told me that she wants to be there for me but because she isn’t making any money (externship) that she may have to bow out down the road. She said that reading the contract made her feel so much better about telling me that.

    2 agree
  13. Now I wish a) that I were getting married any time soon, and b) that I'd have bridesmaids when I do get married!

    Come to think of it, though, I do have several friends who will want to help out with the planning…I may get the chance to adapt this contract for them 🙂

  14. I've already drafted lists of expected duties for various people (bridesmaids, my parents, FH's parents, etc.), and I love the idea of a contract! Each list is a little different for me, since I'm asking people to contribute in different ways. They're all pretty light-hearted, though, including such things as "listen to my rants and ramblings", "be completely honest with me", and "be awesome self, remind me to be awesome self". The list for one of my maids even includes "slap me upside the head (probably metaphorically) if I need it"!

  15. I like the one about "I will look however I want, because {bride} doesn't care." I was in a wedding and the Mother of the Bride told us that we couldn't cut or color our hair (even natural colors) without her permission. I want my BM's to look like themselves!

  16. One of my bridesmaids told me to look this up because I made everyone sign their own contract. The bridesmaids had their own to sign with things like "if I can't be on time, I need to notify someone", "I can feel free to NOT go on a pre-wedding diet". My maid of honor had one to sign with "I will be the only one to touch the train" (she kept telling me that she wanted to do my train), and "I get to go cake testing". I even had one for me with "if I am to become bridezilla, someone WILL smack me across.the back of the head to gain some common ground and be brought back down to earth". Everyone got a kick out of it!

  17. This is great! I might steal this and email itnto my girls… our date is 2 years away so I think this will be a fun way to get everyone in sync (nsync) as we get closer!

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