Can we talk about consensual bridal showers?

By on Dec. 26th
Gina's bride cake

Photo by Danielle Walquist Lynch, used by CC license.

My future mother-in-law has decided that she is throwing me a bridal shower. My wording there is intentional — she did not ask if I wanted one, she did not ask if my bridespeeps were throwing me one (they're not, because they know I don't want one), she Just Decided.

For many reasons, I've tried to be polite and just say "no thanks," but she's insisting.

I have no interest in this event, although I realize that it is very nice of her to offer to throw me one. How do I get out of this? -Kimm

Oh man, there can be all kinds of pre-wedding party activities that people will offer to throw you. That's great… if those are the kinds of things you're interested in. But what if someone is throwing you a party against your will!? How can you be gracious and grateful, while also standing your ground? When is it worth just taking a deep breath and reminding yourself that different people have different ways of expressing their love for you, and putting on your best game face?

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