Cool alternatives for an engagement ring for guys
Advice, Stuff we love
By
on July 27, 2010
72
I'm not engaged, but very much in love with my sweet geek and amazing boyfriend and I'm thinking about popping the question. I would like to give him something like an engagement ring but not really.What would you suggest as cool alternatives for an engagement ring for a guy?
-Melissa
I think the most critical thing to keep in mind, when thinking of what you should give him, is that whatever you choose should have specific relevance to your relationship and you want it to be something equally long-lasting. I'm reminded of one of our Tribe members, FrankiHarrogate, who proposed to her boyfriend with a spoon!
The important part is that we both liked [what I got him] and he was totally over the moon when I asked.
Franki explained, "We were talking about engagements one night and I said, 'Who decided on rings, anyway? Rings are completely arbitrary and I don't really want one. An engagment spoon — now that would be original.' A month or so later… I bought a spoon and proposed to him. Most people think it's neat, some people don't get it at all. The important part is that we both like it and he was totally over the moon when I asked — just as much as I was over the moon when he said yes."
But, if you don't happen to have convenient inside jokes that revolve around engagement traditions, I've compiled a super fun list of things you could use to propose to your boy:
A Necklace
Okay, so your dude doesn't wear rings, but would he wear a necklace?
Perhaps you could get his wedding band early and he could wear it on a necklace like this until the wedding.
Do you have a special song? Get the lyrics hand-stamped on this sterling silver guitar pic and turn it into a necklace.
Okay okay, here is my favorite necklace. It's a new (and geeky?) take on those Best Friend heart necklaces.
A handkerchief
Remember the "bromance notes" Ariel featured in her gifts for groomsmen post? Well you could use them as their original purpose… to convey words of love!
A fancy watch
Watches are sort of like rings in that you can find them in any price range from affordable to this one pictured above is a watch I chose because of the diamond accent, and the fact that it's looks pretty bad-ass.
Something handmade
There are so many incredible stories of OBBs making things with which to propose; including the very first OBB herself, Ariel. Ya'll might remember Ariel's story about proposing to her husband. Ariel proposed at a pottery painting place with, what else, a piece of pottery!
On the second edition of How to propose to your boyfriend, Tribe member He1en shows off her creative proposal box.
Cookies/cakes/baked goods
Mandy proposed to her fellow amateur mycologists boyfriend with these mushroom cookies. Proposing with baked goods is a double whammy — an adorable proposal and a yummy treat all in one.
A special lighter
If you read Offbeat Bride, you may remember that one of the brides proposed to her guy with an "engagement lighter."
This one has lots of space to have something engraved.
'Till death do us part?
Pocket watch
The pocket watch pictured above has perfect surfaces to engrave something on it, or you could even slip in a special picture or a message on the inside. I like the exposed cogs and wheels of this one.
Other ideas…
Anyone else have any ideas? Leave 'em in the comments!
About Megan Finley
Megan Finley is the Managing Editor for Offbeat Bride and the Associate Publisher for the Offbeat Empire. When she's not slaving away for the Empire, she's sharing her dork side on her own blog and on Twitter @meganfinley.
Billy said
What about a drawing of a Tattoo that you both go get together immediately after, maybe with the date, or place it happened?
ginny said
Tools or around the house items that can be engraved. For instance, if you and your man plan to build a house together one day (or he just likes tools), why not have the handle of a hammer engraved? If he likes to cook, maybe a mixer (so he can fix you breakfast in bed!)?
SalaciousD said
Hmmm..how could you apply this to a film or computer geek? Any ideas?
Porscha said
Easy peasy for the film geek. Order his favorite movie, or one of them, on a reel and have the reel engraved. This site: http://www.modernsoundpictures.com/ is just one of a few that you can order something like that from. You could also pay a movie theater in your area to play a proposal during the previews. The price will depend on the theater. You could find a theater that shows classic matinees – they tend to be less expensive and more willing. Something less decadent could include hosting your own movie night at your home – classic popcorn boxes, some milk duds, and print your own movie tickets. You could propose when the credits roll or on the tickets themselves. Good luck!
Erin said
You could have a movie poster printed up with the request… Perhaps a spoof poster for this favourite movie? Or you could sneak it into an actual movie poster?
Jill said
Guitar! My (now) husband is a musician but would never buy himself a Martin (a very, very nice brand). I gave him a Martin when I sort of did/didn't propose. It's a long story but the point is, the guitar was perfect! It's something he'll use and cherish for the rest of his life just like my ring!
Jess said
I gave my fiance a guitar, too. He proposed to me with a ring, but we went out and got his guitar as an engagement present for him. I mean, he spent a ton of money and time on the ring for me, I had to give him something he'd like just as much. He loves it and plays it every day – it was so worth it and he'll treasure it just the same.
Webb42 said
I felt the same. women get the ring and the dudes get nothing its not fair. I however got my fiance an xbox360 as he is into games rather than playing music. I like your idea though
dootsiebug said
I love, love, love the idea of an engagement watch. I gave my (now) fiance a fancy watch when we were dating in high school, and he still wears it to this day. A good watch is on par with the timelessness of an engagement ring.
Plus, I love the idea of being able to give him a diamond. I've always thought that it was sort of weird and unfair that women are traditionally given a pricey diamond engagement ring and then receive a wedding band… why can't men get two pieces of nuptial bling, too?
Anyway, some additional ideas:
- An engraved worry stone (gemstone or rock meant to be carried in the pocket so you can hold it or rub it with your thumb when you're upset or worried–sort of an "I'm always with you" note, eh?)
- Wallet or money clip
- A moleskine (aaah! Or moleskine-alternative) journal or first-edition book
- A tree! A garden! A rubber house plant!
Aine said
My mom tells me it used to be traditional in Italian families to give the groom-to-be an engagement gift, usually including a diamond.
I got my guy an awesome watch for Christmas–then he proposed on Christmas day, and I wished I'd got something else so the watch could be the engagement present. He tells me he calls it his engagement watch, though, which makes me smile.
The Stik said
That's what mi amor and I call the watch I gave him as a Christmas gift/proposal from me. I ended up buying myself a complementary style watch a year later (gotta love Fossil!).
Karen said
I proposed with a piece of art I commissioned of my City of Heroes character proposing to his (and a ring, but the picture was the big thing!).
Erika said
Please to have pictures!
Becca said
We're experience people. I gave him a trip to Bonaroo Music Festival (which he'd been dying to attend for years) and an inexpensive silver ring. It was perfect for for him.
julie said
all this being said, when i was in the process of trying to figure out how to propose, i looked up 'engagement ring for men' and found several nice guys' rings that would work well for a ring-wearer, i should think. they were on the pricey side though so I'm glad i decided to sleep on it and just pop the question without buying it first, bc it turns out he wanted to get me a ring and didn't want one of his own.
LBD said
If he's a biology geek, I saw these on Boing Boing recently, and think they would be AWESOME:
DNA/RNA base pair friendship necklaces
Kendochick said
That. Is. Awesome! I'm totally getting one of these for myself & my best friend (Mr. Spouse doesn't wear necklaces – boo); thanks for the link!
Adrienne said
My husband loves software, so just before our wedding, I got him a copy of Windows 7. He was totally thrilled! (Said something about I knew exactly what would turn him on…) It also made for a nice break from wedding stress. Anyway, you could put a note in a new computer game or something…
Robyn said
I think this could go for way more than just guys. My lovely butch girlfriend would love some of these.
grmnfmm said
I concur! (And so would mine!)
Sara said
Why not get him and yourself a ring? While it may not be traditional for the guy to wear a ring during the engagement, it is really meaningful and to me shows great gender equality. My fiance is wearing a band during our engagement that will be engraved once we are married and serve as his wedding band. It was his idea. What an amazing finace I have!
Sarah Lee said
I did something similar to this, since the way we got "engaged" was more of a deep discussion which went into "I know I want to marry you". We bought each other matching Gaelic inscription rings, which I love so much I wouldn't mind keeping for our actual wedding rings too! I'm all for gender equality so it was a win-win for both of us!
Erin said
This is exactly how ours went down, too. Since our "proposal" was just a mutual decision, it felt weird not to share rings and be equal partners. We went with matching mokume gane bands of copper and sterling silver, which may end up doubling as wedding bands (engraving is a great idea – we should think about that!)
I like the fact that our relationship is so even and equal that it seemed illogical to have only one party wear a ring… it makes me feel like a partner, rather than some bride on a pedestal.
Chelsea said
I love,love,LOVE the idea of proposing to your guy with a pocket watch. I think I might very well keep this in mind for mine. (^.^)
Sara said
I've already got it in the works to propose to my guy at Disneyland this fall (on Pirates of the Caribbean, only our most favorite ride of all time) and I'm having my grandma help me refurbish/repair an old family pocket watch to give him and an old family heirloom ring for him to give me, once he (hopefully) says yes! I love all these ideas though, and I will keep the tools idea in mind in case the watch can't be repaired— my man does love a good hand plane.
Misha said
My partner proposed to me with a ring but didn't want one herself so she got a tattoo which is posted on my blog.
Etta said
The spoon thing is actually a tradition in Wales. Love spoons were carved from wood (usually in a interlocking knot pattern) by a lover for his beloved and signified both his affection and intentions. I love the modern twist!!
miranda said
Thank you so much for these ideas!! This is so timely for me, as I have been toying with the idea of a "counter proposal" when my guy finally proposes, and the handkerchief idea is PERFECT for us! And, what do you know, I have a bunch of embroidery floss that belonged to my beloved Grandma, and that I got when she passed away, AND my mom has some of my Grandpa's old handkerchiefs. Instant heirloom!! I intend to embroider on it: "Will you marry me back?" I am so excited about this now! I knew I loved the idea of "proposing back" to him, but I couldn't come up with something that was both meaningful and that I could also carry with me wherever we go, and have ready for when he proposes. Perfect, perfect, perfect. Again, thank you!
Bonnie said
Great ideas!
I just bought a men's wedding ring. It had a little diamond in it (still manly though) and I figured hey, it's kind of like an engagement ring! He doesn't wear it though, it's being treated like a wedding ring. It was just a prop, really.
Proposal itself was written on a napkin and hidden with some surprise cinnamon rolls. I do not recommend this if you are impatient. Boy ate all the cinnamon rolls before finding it and was wondering why I looked ill D:
dtotheq said
I proposed to my boy with Cufflinks (shame he said no).
Bonnie said
I gave my guy cuff links (http://www.etsy.com/transaction/24824990) in a simplified proposal box as He1en's above (thanks for the tutorial!). Five months later I'm still waiting for an answer, but he responded very positively and there have been two mysterious envelopes from a jeweler's, so I'm feeling pretty happy
J said
I gave an ex-boyfriend (who absolutely didn't deserve it) a slightly beaten-up stainless steel bracelet with an engraving on the inside. It's from Etsy – they make them specially, and they're quite cheap.
Rugged, able to be worn all the time, but still romantic.
Meghan said
I proposed to my husband with a simple gold ring. If I (traditionally) have to wear a ring signifying I'm engaged why musn't he!? We got matching celtic rings when we married.
Little Red Lupine said
My guy is proposing (he had to reorder the ring after it was lost/stolen on our recent trip to Europe) but we also talked about what I could get him in return because I wanted him to have something too. We agreed on earrings for him since he has 3 piercings at the moment. I found gorgeous wolf's head earrings with rubies for eyes (since there are rubies in my ring) and rings that are made to assemble your own earrings in 10g. Can't wait!
HelleCat said
Where little red?! My FH hubby proposed to me with a ruby also, and calls me his "little red"!!
Aha!! FH's ears are 2's though.
Sara James said
i LOVE that there are so many comments on this post!!! I proposed to my boyfriend in April and originally was going with the watch idea….BUT i bought him a super nice watch for Christmas….so plan B was some champagne flutes from Tiffany's etched with "will you" on one and "marry me?" on the other. I figure Tiffany's lasts forever right? As we were in our pondering conversations about marriage he said something about me needing a huge rock (LOVE THIS MAN!) and I said "oh so you have to do the proposing huh? what about the modern day woman?" and he said "well if your planning to propose you better have a ring, modern day woman!". So my advise would be to fish around and see what his ideas are around marriage and what he'd like IF you were to propose.
Briana said
I gave my fiance a Blue Feather of Happiness. We both play Harvest Moon, and in every version of the game that you can get married, you propose by finding and giving a blue feather to the one you love. I found a blue feather pin with Swarovski crystals all over it, and proposed. He wears it sometimes, but usually it's just in its case on his bedside table.
rxqueen said
I proposed with a silver key. I told him it was the key to my heart. It sounds a little cheesy, but he said yes and wears it on a chain around his neck
Stephanie Smoot said
For guys or non traditional couples, what about custom artwork? I just finished a painting for a girl who wanted a picture of her wedding bouquet before the wedding. Basically she wanted something she could take to the florist to say this is what I want, as well as something to have hanging in their new home on the wedding night, unlike all the wedding pictures that you have to wait months for. I've also had a guy approach me about painting a picture of the ring he was saving up to buy his girlfriend but he wanted to propose on valentine's day and wouldn't have it paid off til summer, so he had me paint a small 5×7 picture of the ring in the box with a rose. She *loved* it.