Comments on: A Fat Bride Survival Guide http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide Creative Alternatives for Independent Brides Sun, 21 Mar 2010 17:48:45 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: mmcsip http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-52253 mmcsip Fri, 09 Oct 2009 02:13:34 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-52253 This is such a great posting and I feel less alone! I'm newly engaged and am plus-sized. Thanks for such cool words! This is such a great posting and I feel less alone! I'm newly engaged and am plus-sized. Thanks for such cool words!

]]> By: Jessica Johnson http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-51371 Jessica Johnson Thu, 10 Sep 2009 06:19:36 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-51371 What do the "health issues" have to do with the topic at hand? It kills me when interlopers on "fat lady" subjects make comments on the health issues, as if fat women have no idea about the "risks" that come from being a certain size. We're fat, not stupid, and most of us know more about exercise and dieting than thin people. In short, let's stay on-topic. I'm engaged myself...was big when I met my fiance, big when I got engaged, and I'm big now. I've been big pretty much my entire life. Losing weight just for a wedding isn't going to happen. I'd like tighter arms :-) but I'm not going to add "lose weight" to the long list of things to do before the wedding just to please other people...I like myself and my fiance likes what he sees, so who else matters? Now I do exercise and look to eat relatively healthy (not specifically for weight loss, one can be fat and fit), but it's for the long haul. Loving my body starts now, not "ohh whenever I get thin." Anyway, I loved the article, and I loved the premise of it. What do the "health issues" have to do with the topic at hand? It kills me when interlopers on "fat lady" subjects make comments on the health issues, as if fat women have no idea about the "risks" that come from being a certain size. We're fat, not stupid, and most of us know more about exercise and dieting than thin people. In short, let's stay on-topic.

I'm engaged myself…was big when I met my fiance, big when I got engaged, and I'm big now. I've been big pretty much my entire life. Losing weight just for a wedding isn't going to happen. I'd like tighter arms :-) but I'm not going to add "lose weight" to the long list of things to do before the wedding just to please other people…I like myself and my fiance likes what he sees, so who else matters? Now I do exercise and look to eat relatively healthy (not specifically for weight loss, one can be fat and fit), but it's for the long haul. Loving my body starts now, not "ohh whenever I get thin." Anyway, I loved the article, and I loved the premise of it.

]]> By: hinakuu http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-51347 hinakuu Wed, 09 Sep 2009 17:01:47 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-51347 I understand wanting to lose weight or be in better physical shape, and I think if a wedding helps you actualize that, that's a good thing. However, 1) The goal should be better overall health, not trying to fit into a dress 5 sizes smaller. 2) exercising should make you feel better about your body. 3) when considering weight loss, you shouldn't plan to lose a large amount of weight in a small amount of time. 4) The exercise should help you de-stress from wedding planning, rather than becoming an issue itself. As to being overweight or obese: the health issues shouldn't be overlooked. If your doctor is concerned with your weight, you should be too. But I think it's more important for people to be fit and health- conscious than to try and stuff themselves in a dress. I understand wanting to lose weight or be in better physical shape, and I think if a wedding helps you actualize that, that's a good thing.

However,
1) The goal should be better overall health, not trying to fit into a dress 5 sizes smaller.
2) exercising should make you feel better about your body.
3) when considering weight loss, you shouldn't plan to lose a large amount of weight in a small amount of time.
4) The exercise should help you de-stress from wedding planning, rather than becoming an issue itself.

As to being overweight or obese: the health issues shouldn't be overlooked. If your doctor is concerned with your weight, you should be too. But I think it's more important for people to be fit and health- conscious than to try and stuff themselves in a dress.

]]> By: mmcsip http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50971 mmcsip Fri, 28 Aug 2009 01:57:08 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50971 So inspiring! Glad you walked out and fired those jerks. Thank you for sharing this. So inspiring! Glad you walked out and fired those jerks. Thank you for sharing this.

]]> By: OffbeatAriel http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50936 OffbeatAriel Thu, 27 Aug 2009 16:51:28 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50936 "If anything, a good time to start a workout plan would be AFTER the wedding when you have more time to relax and settle in with your new spouse" Totally agreed, Anne! I think I've mentioned this before, but Andreas and I both got in better shape in the years AFTER our wedding, not because we had some SPECIAL DAY!!! to strive for, but because we wanted to commit to our ongoing shared health and happiness. "If anything, a good time to start a workout plan would be AFTER the wedding when you have more time to relax and settle in with your new spouse"

Totally agreed, Anne! I think I've mentioned this before, but Andreas and I both got in better shape in the years AFTER our wedding, not because we had some SPECIAL DAY!!! to strive for, but because we wanted to commit to our ongoing shared health and happiness.

]]> By: Anne http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50935 Anne Thu, 27 Aug 2009 16:39:45 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50935 It's totally offensive on so many levels. I'm a runner and just got engaged and it's astonishing to me to read all these mainstream bridal plans/websites/books that say things like, "6 months before the wedding: start your workout plan!" I already try to work out and keep fit, why would I start and end just for a wedding? I don't plan to change the amount of time I spend running or working out at all. It seems like a terribly unhealthy idea to base a fitness plan or diet around a wedding (and solely around the motivation of losing weight!!) - you could increase your risk of injury by starting too fast, or pushing yourself to hard, or make yourself sick crash dieting. A workout plan should start and begin at a much slower pace and because of the motivations the person has (health, stress relief), not from any outside ideals of what a bride "should" look like. If anything, a good time to start a workout plan would be AFTER the wedding when you have more time to relax and settle in with your new spouse : D It's totally offensive on so many levels. I'm a runner and just got engaged and it's astonishing to me to read all these mainstream bridal plans/websites/books that say things like, "6 months before the wedding: start your workout plan!" I already try to work out and keep fit, why would I start and end just for a wedding? I don't plan to change the amount of time I spend running or working out at all.
It seems like a terribly unhealthy idea to base a fitness plan or diet around a wedding (and solely around the motivation of losing weight!!) – you could increase your risk of injury by starting too fast, or pushing yourself to hard, or make yourself sick crash dieting. A workout plan should start and begin at a much slower pace and because of the motivations the person has (health, stress relief), not from any outside ideals of what a bride "should" look like. If anything, a good time to start a workout plan would be AFTER the wedding when you have more time to relax and settle in with your new spouse : D

]]> By: Alocin http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50792 Alocin Tue, 25 Aug 2009 09:54:56 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50792 Seeing all the beautiful brides on Offbeat Bride in all their diversity has been really important for me in becoming much more accepting of my body and believing that there might be a man who will find me attractive - I've been a bridesmaid a couple of times in the last few years and surrounded by 'normal' bridal magazines which only show slender 'real' brides, to the point where I subconsciously started believing than only women who looked like that fall in love and get married. Which of course, is objectively ridiculous. So thank you for sharing your wedding - and I only wish your dressmaker was still in business for if and when I get married (I live in Brisbane.) Seeing all the beautiful brides on Offbeat Bride in all their diversity has been really important for me in becoming much more accepting of my body and believing that there might be a man who will find me attractive – I've been a bridesmaid a couple of times in the last few years and surrounded by 'normal' bridal magazines which only show slender 'real' brides, to the point where I subconsciously started believing than only women who looked like that fall in love and get married. Which of course, is objectively ridiculous. So thank you for sharing your wedding – and I only wish your dressmaker was still in business for if and when I get married (I live in Brisbane.)

]]> By: chibride http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50780 chibride Mon, 24 Aug 2009 22:51:39 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50780 I had a shockingly good experience at David's Bridal too. There was definitely some squeezing into things, but she pulled a lot of different dresses for me to try on...all of which could be ordered in my size. In the end, I went to a different location & bought my dress off the rack. I loved it & it was reasonably priced to boot. I must confess I was too chicken to go into any other bridal salon...because I already knew nothing would fit me. I hated feeling like that. On a side note, it was difficult to find that many pictures of plus sized brides in gowns (kudos to offbeat bride for always having a nice selection of photos to peruse & david's bridal showed most of its plus size gowns on women). I knew from the start that I wasn't going to starve myself to fit into a dress. Wedding day shmedding day...I was going to be chubby happy self. However, if I could take a pill to be 2 inches taller...I'd do it in a heart beat ;) I had a shockingly good experience at David's Bridal too. There was definitely some squeezing into things, but she pulled a lot of different dresses for me to try on…all of which could be ordered in my size. In the end, I went to a different location & bought my dress off the rack. I loved it & it was reasonably priced to boot.
I must confess I was too chicken to go into any other bridal salon…because I already knew nothing would fit me. I hated feeling like that.
On a side note, it was difficult to find that many pictures of plus sized brides in gowns (kudos to offbeat bride for always having a nice selection of photos to peruse & david's bridal showed most of its plus size gowns on women).
I knew from the start that I wasn't going to starve myself to fit into a dress. Wedding day shmedding day…I was going to be chubby happy self. However, if I could take a pill to be 2 inches taller…I'd do it in a heart beat ;)

]]> By: Antonia http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50753 Antonia Sun, 23 Aug 2009 15:35:06 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50753 I, too, had a bad experience at a bridal shop. I'm a 12-14, but all the sample sizes were 10 max, and even though the saleswoman was pretty professional I felt incredibly self-conscious trying to squeeze into dresses that were simply not right for my body. I ended up buying a very simple white dress off the rack at Bloomingdales instead that was actually my size as well as my style, and I feel like a million bucks in it. It's worth looking outside of traditional bridal shops sometimes, because you never know where you might find your dream dress. I, too, had a bad experience at a bridal shop. I'm a 12-14, but all the sample sizes were 10 max, and even though the saleswoman was pretty professional I felt incredibly self-conscious trying to squeeze into dresses that were simply not right for my body. I ended up buying a very simple white dress off the rack at Bloomingdales instead that was actually my size as well as my style, and I feel like a million bucks in it. It's worth looking outside of traditional bridal shops sometimes, because you never know where you might find your dream dress.

]]> By: Chris S http://offbeatbride.com/2009/08/a-fat-bride-survival-guide/comment-page-1#comment-50741 Chris S Sat, 22 Aug 2009 22:56:34 +0000 http://offbeatbride.com/?p=2803#comment-50741 I think that blog is good not just for brides who love their bodies, but anyone who does. I think that blog is good not just for brides who love their bodies, but anyone who does.

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