Comments on: Dancing at a dry wedding

By: Richele

Richele — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 01:24:31 +0000

Thank you for this thread. My partner and I are choosing to have a dry wedding. His sister and her husband are in recovery, as is one of our groomsmen. We are committed to a totally drama-free experience, and want our loved ones in recovery to feel super comfortable.

Instead of booze, we will toast with sparkling white grape or apple juice and we because Lucas and I are Health Coaches by trade, we always start all of our events with a veggie juice shots, so why should our wedding be any different?!

After meeting with our caterer today and hearing that our budget only lends itself to "heavy hors d'oeuvres" we would need to cut our guest list way down to give everyone a sit down dinner. So, I am thinking a brunch style wedding makes complete sense.

I have a degree in dance and was born to boogie, my partner is a big dance guy too, and I agree not everyone is going to relax enough to actually dance without booze. We are going to explore the board game idea to help break the ice and give the non-dancers something to engage in, rather than feeling like a spectator.

Thanks for reading and for the great ideas everyone!!!

By: Daelyn

Daelyn — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 02:56:49 +0000

I went to a dry wedding this summer and two things brought people to the dance floor: #1 The bridesmaids and groomsmen joined the bride and groom, soon guests followed suit. #2 Kids! They don't need alcohol to have a good time and they reminded everyone else that dancing can be fun and goofy even if you aren't intoxicated. So maybe consider allowing your guests to bring their children to the reception, if you haven't already.

By: Emma

Emma — Sun, 15 May 2011 20:55:40 +0000

For UK people (I have no idea how prevalent this might be in the US) I have one thing to say: CEILIDH! I'm in Scotland and it's the best way ever of getting people up dancing.

You have a good band, with a caller who steps people through the dances before they start, and because you need six or eight to a set, people will pull their friends up. No one really knows the steps, so everyone makes mistakes, the dances get faster as they go along so by the end everyone is breathless and laughing and the ice is well and truly broken.

Once people have ceilidhed (I have no idea how to conjugate that!) they won't mind ordinary dancing at all!

By: Amy Sue

Amy Sue — Sun, 15 May 2011 14:11:00 +0000

we are having a dry evening reception and a huge candy/non alchy drink bar as well. For all of the same reasons- recovering alcoholics/ driving/ cost…And i know that we are going to have problems with flasks and sneakers… but if they respect us and our decision, they can keep it to themselves!!
I'm NOT the fun police.. and as long as our guests don't get my recovering hubby to be to drink, i'm fine with it. at the after party camping area i will probably drink too, but NOT at the family infested reception.. who wants to be a drunken mess on their wedding day?!?

By: Rita

Rita — Thu, 12 May 2011 16:48:12 +0000

We had a similar situation. 1st, we used "drink tickets" at the bar to limit the amount of drinking, and limited the kinds of beverages served, while providing plenty of non-alcoholic options as well. The side of our family that doesn't look down on drinking paid for the alcohol.

2nd, we put this sign on the bar:
“The master of the banquet tasted the water that had been turned into wine. This, the first of his miraculous signs, Jesus performed in Cana of Galilee.” – John 2
to remind my conservative (Christian) relatives that Jesus' first miracle was providing alcohol at a wedding

By: Rita

Rita — Thu, 12 May 2011 16:42:46 +0000

My aunt brought long streamers for the kids to play with at our wedding, but they ended up being *everyone's* favorite – adults that I never thought would dance couldn't wait to get their hands on a streamer and start waving it around, and pretty soon they were on the dance floor, dancing with their streamers.

I definitely recommend props – streamers, hula hoops, etc. – it gives people a "crutch" until they're comfortable enough to dance themselves!

By: kayfay

kayfay — Wed, 11 May 2011 23:12:20 +0000

Italian sodas (And friends) has been a major part of our plan from the beginning. We don't really drink, and there are too many very important people in our group that have major alcohol issues – some are alcoholics, but the ones that are most important to me have had serious trauma from alcoholic family, and since we two are not that into booze… So anyhow, Various non-alcoholic mixed drinks are fun, tasty, and provide conversational opportunities. We're planning on normal italian sodas (fruit flavors, etc.) plus really weird ones. (Rose limeade, violet syrup, rosemary, and maybe (If I can swing it) curry,) Plus we'll have iced teas, lemonade, and coffeecoffeecoffee. relevant to the main subject, make sure to invite your weirdest friend: I get high on people (this is not as trite or cliche as it sounds; My ADD acts up ,and the more people there are, the crazier I get) and at the last several weddings I attended, I dragged all kinds of people out onto the dance floor. When they see a funny looking pair like me, (I am pretty much spherical) and a gawky, nervous, 6-foot-5 thin 17 year old boy who I practically dragged onto the dance floor, (It was way less creepy than it sounds) well, nost of the guests know that they can't look as silly as me! (admittedly I was also dressed as a pirate at the time…)

By: Jessica

Jessica — Wed, 11 May 2011 22:16:42 +0000

I just got engaged and my family is very conservative. I drink and enjoy drinking at weddings, but my side of the family doesn't drink at all and actually looks down upon drinking. Any ideas on how I could have drinks at the reception and not upset my conservative family?

By: Christyna

Christyna — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 14:41:28 +0000

We are going to be having alcohol at our wedding only because it was important to my fiance. Before we had started planning though I didn't even think about it. There is NOTHING wrong with a dry wedding. One of my favorite weddings that I've attended was my cousins, there was no alcohol present, but all I remember was having a blast! She had a huge table (sat about 12) in the center of the room with all of the other rounds set up around it because my stepdad's family had all wanted to sit together. We were constantly laughing and cracking jokes and the fun and laughter was contagious. My aunt was latter told by the staff that they had never seen people have so much fun without the alcohol. Use any crazy family that you may have to mix things up… and everyone will have a great time.

By: laura

laura — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 06:48:31 +0000

One way to get people dancing without alcohol is to offer a dance class. A friend of ours is a ballroom dance instructor. He has kindly agreed to give a lesson for our attendees. This breaks the ice because then everyone is dancing. Once everyone starts getting comfortable with the moves, you will find people getting into it. I've been to a few open dance classes, which are a great way to get people on the floor without alcohol…even the less than willing (my partner among them, initially) eventually embrace the idea. With more people than dancing than sitting, most guests will probably agree that cutting a rug is by far more entertaining.