Non-matching bridesmaid dresses

Friends & Family Advice By on September 04, 2008 55


I am an Auckland, New Zealand OBB and am thinking of asking my three brideswomen to just pick a dress they like (maybe within a colour scheme…?) I don't think they have to be matching because they are all uniquely beautiful and hopefully will feel more comfortable in something that they have picked out themselves. Have you got any pics of non-matching brideswomens' dresses? -Sabrina

This is actually a very popular choice among offbeat brides — encouraging bridesmaids to wear something that generally coordinates, but isn't matchy-matchy. I've heard stories of some bridesmaids being uncomfortable with the idea (I guess freedom can be overwhelming?), but giving your brides dress liberation can be a great way to make sure that your ladies enjoy maximum awesomeness on your wedding day.

As for pictures — damn right I've got some!

Click each photo for more info. They're all linked to their original sources.

Photo by Gwyneth Colleen Photography (via Gwyneth Colleen Photography)

(Via Dingmoonment)

(via Offbeat Bride pool on Flickr)

(via Jenn on the OBT)

(via kvetch.indiebride)

(via Tales of a Female Husband)

500464_Shop for new clothing with a retro vintage feel.

Want more pictures? We've got a whole tag archive of non-matching bridesmaids!


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About Ariel Meadow Stallings

Author of Offbeat Bride: Creative Alternatives for Independent Brides, Ariel acts as the publisher of all the Offbeat Empire websites. She lives, loves, and dorks out hard in Seattle, WA.

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Comments (55)
  • YESSSSS! I have been thinking of doing different dresses for my bridesmaids but could barely find any other examples… I LOVE these. Perfect timing! Thank you!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • I wanted my bridesmaids (my sister and my best friend) to have non-matchy dresses…left it completely up to them. They picked the exact same dress in the same color : ) I mean, it is a beautiful dress, but I thought it was kind of funny that they ended up matchy after all.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • Everyone always seems to floored when I tell them that my bridesmaids just picked some blue dresses out of their closest and are gonna wear those.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  +2 readers agree with this comment
  • I love it! I'm planning on going this route with my maids.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • This is what I wanted! But my BM's wanted to match. O-kay!!!! At least we found something they both loved. All these girls look so lovely!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • Great idea. One of my favorite brides just told her 3 best friends "Pick out a slammin' dress and I'll pick up the tab." The bridesmaids were so happy and they made extra sure to help with every last detail thanks to the bride's thoughfulness.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • I did this for my girls. I just told them a general idea of what I wanted (black lace dresses, somewhere around knee to mid calf length) and let them pick whatever they wanted. They all looked amazing!! I did buy them all their jewelry, little gloves and made them hair doodads.. so they did have matching elements, but I certainly didn't want to tell them to wear the same thing. Plus I had two pregnant bridesmaids.. so I just wanted them to have some freedom! Also the other perk is that they can control what they spend. I know that at least two of my girls spent less than 30 bucks, so that made me happy! :)

    Here's a (horrible)pic: http://www.auroraskye.com/photos/meandgirls.jpg

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • My girls are all wearing black dresses in whatever style they want! I told them that my only two rules were that it be tea length and that it is something they will wear again. That way they can get something within their own budget and be comfortable since they are all different body types.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  +1 readers agree with this comment
  • when i thought i was having 2 BM, i told them to wear black because they both look good in it and would be able to wear it again, but now i'm down to 1 BM. i told her to wear whatever she wanted but she said that she liked my reasons for a black dress and is sticking with it.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • i love this look, but i feel like it would be really hard to pull off. do the bm's have to coordinate to make sure they aren't totally clashing? or do you just tell them all to "buy a mostly green dress"?

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • Those pictures are excellent! I'm doing this with my two bridesmaids because I wanted them to feel very comfortable and maybe even to be able to wear the dresses again. My only requirement was that they be a generally dark brown color.

    For one of the bridesmaids, it worked perfectly. She's happy and she's planning on wearing her dress to her company Christmas party. Bridesmaid number two however has been a NIGHTMARE. She doesn't like brown, she keeps trying to force the other bridesmaid to match w/ her because she thinks it's "stupid " if they "look patchwork", she complains about wearing a dress and when I tell her she can wear a suit w/ skirt or pants she says she has to wear a dress. GAH!

    I guess I'm just warning that this is a wonderful idea but not a panacea. If one of them wants to be difficult, they will still be difficult, no matter how nice you are.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
    • LOL! Yeah, I think some folks prefer a little more direction because then they can complain about what you "made" them do, instead of having to take the blame if they don't feel great in what they get. ;)

      We gave my girls a target color to aim for, but there will be a wide range from royal to teal to almost navy. The guys will have different blue patterned neckties and could wear either black suits or black tuxes with white shirts.

      VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

        THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • On September 4th, 2008 at 12:36 PM
    swirlgrrrl said

    i asked my best lady to wear a black dress of her choosing. she still wanted a bit of guidance though, so we went shopping together. she finally had it narrowed down to two great dresses, and asked me to choose which i liked. trying to remain un-bridezilla, i again asked her to choose. finally, she looked at me squarely and said, "pick a frickin' dress," and i did. so it was a collaborative effort!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  +1 readers agree with this comment
  • Ya know, I tried to do this. And the girls rebelled and told me they didn't want to have to think about what dress they were wearing. They just wanted me to pick. One of them actually cried. Not exactly what I was going for!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • Wow, thanks everyone for your comments and your pics (they are stunning!). Much appreciated :)

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • yay! these are great. i was even anti color scheme/coordination to start with, but i've been coming around to suggesting a color and letting my girls go for it. :-D

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • I also asked my sisters to choose whatever dress they liked and they were really resistant. I think they are going to end up in the same dress. But no matter what, they are going to look beautiful!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • Elena, I'm having the same problem with my sisters… two of them are trying to insist to the other two that they should all go to David's Bridal together so that they can get them all in exactly the same color, and possibly even style.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • OHMYGOD, I wish I'd been given this option when I was a bridesmaid.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • A friend of mine did this — she mailed color cards (like the kinds you get for paint colors) to everyone in the wedding party and told them to find a dress in the general color scheme… I thought that was super smart. And it worked out beautifully!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  +3 readers agree with this comment
  • we did this too – i wanted all my girlies to be as happy as me in their dresses! and what with them all being different shapes and sizes it just made sense for them to choose their own dress

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.…=783665622

    http://www.facebook.com/photo.…=783665622

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • On September 5th, 2008 at 4:14 AM
    Kimberleee said

    I am so excited to see these dresses all work out, especially since my wedding is in 22 days and I am planning for the same thing. The wedding is a beach wedding and the theme is tropical, so I asked all my bridesmaids to pick out a knee length cocktail dress in any bright color of their choosing. It was actually harder for them then if I had just told them to get a color and a dress, but, at least I know they have a dress they wanted.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • I am going to be a bridesmaid this November, and I desperately wish the bride let us pick our own dresses. It just seems cruel to expect a gal with DDDs to go strapless.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  +4 readers agree with this comment
  • My girls all wore different styles & different colours… adding my pics to that thread right now!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • I'm getting married in November, and my two sisters are my bridal attendants. I didn't want them to have to buy a dress that would make them uncomfortable and that they would never wear again. One sister is wearing a gray silk suit she already had, the other found a pink dress on clearance for $15! Also, rather than make the groom and his attendants rent tuxes, they are all wearing gray suits and we found matching ties for them to wear to coordinate the wedding colors, as well as the same color ribbon to put on the bouquets and corsages (which we're doing DIY). I'll send photos after the wedding!

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment
  • Amen to this– I think my favorite 4 words when being a bridesmaid are: "Choose your own dress". My sister had us all wear black dresses (even though a July country wedding). They looked great! And don't you want your best gals who stand up with you to feel beautiful, sexy and comfortable in what they are wearing? They should be enjoying themselves as well.

    Plus from an aesthetic point of view, different dresses are just more interesting to look at.

    VA:F [1.9.13_1145]

      THIS!  0 readers agree with this comment

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