I am a totally offbeat bride wanna-be … completely trapped in a semi-traditional girl. Last week I sent out save the date cards. Awesome — designed using my Photoshop skills, picture of us, love it. Then came the mailing. I went to Target to buy a sharpie to write the addresses on the envelopes. I almost paid $12 for a pack of 15 Sharpies because I wanted the brown one. Why the brown one? Because it matches the wedding color scheme.
Sometimes I need to be saved from myself. Thanks for the site — it really helps me keep perspective sometimes and be true to who we are and what we want. From reminding myself that it's much more sane to buy a $1 black sharpie to making me feel like it's ok not to want to talk about my wedding 24/7, you're doing wonders for us girls who haven't quite crossed the "I'm wearing a red dress if I damn well please" line yet. So thank you for supporting my semi-independentness. — Les
P.S. I realize that purchasing a black sharpie over a brown one doesn't make me an independent bride, but it shows me that I haven't completely gone over to the dark side.
Les, you are so welcome for the inspiration and perspective. To me, offbeat isn't a toggle switch — it's not an are or aren't. It's not a contest. It's all shades of grey and what's important is thinking for yourself and making decisions based on your own beliefs and values instead of the defaults that are spoon-fed to brides everywhere. Regardless, this site is here to inspire and challenge all brides who need a little more offbeat in their lives … not just the red dress wearers.
Comments on "Changing weddings, one Sharpie at a time"
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Sarah
February 21st, 2008 · 5:47 AM · #
I love Sharpies. =D
Britt
February 21st, 2008 · 5:50 AM · #
Just be thankful it wasn't a "wedding" sharpie. You might have had to auction up your first born to afford it.
Tiffany
February 21st, 2008 · 5:53 AM · #
Yay! I know it helps me to hear this reminder.
MelissaKoren
February 21st, 2008 · 6:21 AM · #
ok, this may be defeating the purpose, but in case you can't stand it – you can go to A.C. Moore or Michaels or any other craft shop and by the sharpies by the each. I did get brown – $4 for 6 of them!
Kara
February 21st, 2008 · 10:04 AM · #
Or any local art supply shop has them in all colors of the rainbow (tho, is brown a color of the rainbow?). It's great to have your day your way, but it's also sooo hard not to get caught up in the whole wedding shopping frenzy – esp when the mainstream wedding gear is getting kinda cooler these days.
KC
February 21st, 2008 · 12:03 PM · #
i agree that being off-beat isnt a contest. i am planning my wedding, and i am not ready to make a red-dress committment, tho i think they are stunning its not me. i think being off-beat is all about being urself no matter what others think. during my plans i am removing the "fluff" that others expect from a wedding which i find unnecessary (such as response cards and place cards).
just be urself and plan ur wedding for u and ur fiance – not because everyone else does it and its expected
Shel
February 21st, 2008 · 5:08 PM · #
That gave me a great idea! You know sharpie.com lets you customize your sharpies? You could totally use them as STDs or as party favors with your names and date. Oh! I'm excited.
farfelue
February 21st, 2008 · 10:00 PM · #
Ha! Welcome and enjoy! Yes it's important to just be yourself, and not cave in to the ridiculous peer and social pressure to buy useless crap or pay a fortune for 'The Day'.
I for one am going the red dress route (Hey a billion chinese and indian brides can't be wrong
but really it should be YOUR day, not submit-to-what- society- expects day. A touch of tradition, a flare of originality and sparks of freshness, voila.
Cate
February 22nd, 2008 · 1:44 AM · #
You can custonmize Sharpies? AWESOME!!!
Shel
February 22nd, 2008 · 5:15 AM · #
Helz yea bitches, just got to sharpie.com, I talked my husband into them!
Heather
February 22nd, 2008 · 5:42 AM · #
Wow. Customizable sharpies just made my WEEK. Yeah, Les, I'm with you. I find myself suddenly obsessing over weird crap and simultaneously hating myself for it. Offbeat Bride = wedding zen.
Tara
February 22nd, 2008 · 8:40 AM · #
Customized Sharpies are FAB! I just got my fiance a half-dozen of them for Valentine's Day (we're Sharpie whores). I'm getting married in a week – I'm wearing a sixties vintage black, a-line cocktail dress to my wedding.
Do it the way it feels right to you, and don't sweat the little details. When it's over, all people will remember was whether they had fun or not. Seriously.
One Love Photo
February 23rd, 2008 · 10:32 PM · #
I have to admit, I probably would have bought the big pack just so I could have the brown one. I can really go crazy on little details… but is that such a bad thing? I love this post I can completely relate. But I know in the end I would feel guilty about it but I would have spent the extra $$ to have the BROWN!
Sara
February 24th, 2008 · 8:18 PM · #
This is really a lovely letter. One that I really identify with.
Kit
July 17th, 2008 · 12:52 PM · #
I would totally have bought the big pack. Then again, I work with markers constantly (and always need new ones because I'm clumsy, lazy and all sorts of other adjectives that mean I frequently can't find the caps and kill them). Yay for sanity though!
blu-k
September 23rd, 2008 · 2:30 AM · #
It was great to hear this story … I really relate to it. The other day my MIL asked me if I was going to get my teeth whitened for the wedding. I told her I'd never heard anything so ridiculous. But now it seems like every regular wedding website has a 'teeth whitening' page, and i'm starting to get a complex.
So I just go to offbeat bride, breathe out, and save my $$$!