I appreciated this post from a message board I found in my referral logs:
People planning alternative weddings sometimes think that by having an alternative wedding they're automatically avoiding the scariness that comes with the Great White. But the same sort of problems apply: you can be fixated on the party and not the marriage; you can turn into a frightening Bridezilla still; you can over-spend; you can over-tax everyone else; you can still show unrestrained greed.
Comments on "Not so offbeat after all"
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Rachel
December 17th, 2007 · 10:12 AM · #
I read the rest of the thread and kind of wished I hadn't. While some of what they said made sense (make costumes optional for guests)I also thought they were being "judgey" and closeminded about weddings. Who says that a reception has to be any different from a normal get together with friends and family where it's potluck? BTW, I'm not having a potluck (don't trust a lot of our guests to bring edible food – cooking is not a strength of many), but I don't see anything wrong with it.
Ariel
December 17th, 2007 · 10:22 AM · #
Oh, I totally agree that the rest of the thread is a complete waste of time. But this one particular quote is a good one, and worth taking to heart.
zan
December 17th, 2007 · 10:34 AM · #
Who says being a bride does not mean your are not a bitch? Whether you are a bitch with a mohawk or a bitch with a Jennifer Aniston haircut, you are still what you are, and planning a wedding will bring it out in full force. Like Ariel said in her book, remember that you are outnumbered and you have to deal with these people after the wedding.
Lily
December 17th, 2007 · 4:59 PM · #
Amen Zan!
I can feel when I start drifting in the direction of full out bitch bride. I've found the easiest way to regin myself in is to remember "fun not perfect." Fun for me, fun for him, and fun for everyone involved, not only on the day, but also leading up to it!
There was also a discussion about this on the Tribe site in relation to green weddings.
cat
December 18th, 2007 · 8:01 PM · #
~sighs~ they need to read your book, ariel.
Jasmine
January 5th, 2008 · 3:51 PM · #
I actually started that thread to get a read on how more 'conservative' relatives may see things. Some things I didn't think would be a problem were a HUGE issue with these folks.